Happy Birthday to my Best Friend

~guest post by Patrick

In my life, I have had, and lost, many friends. Friends come and go and that's just life. What does not come and go is family. For better or for worse, you are stuck with your family. I am a firm believer that the people with whom you surround yourself ultimately will shape you as a person. I am certain that in my life my family has shaped me as a person and inside my family no person has been closer to me than my oldest sister, Mary Beth.

{Mom note: Patrick's arm is wrapped in a huge cast. He had surgery two days before. Apparently, this injury-for-birthdays tradition dates way back.}

Now make no mistake, my oldest sister is still my younger sister and no matter how old and mature she gets, she will always be little to me. There is a sort of iconic photo in our house that shows me with Bee and Mom, just hanging out on a hospital bed the day she was born. Now I don't remember that day, but from the look on my face, I don't think I was too fond of the idea of losing the title of "family baby." And while I may not remember that moment, I do remember my relationship with Bee from a very young age pretty vividly.

    I can remember playing with her and I can remember when "playing" turned to "hanging out" that turned to "chillin'.." In the "playing" days, I thought I could turn Bee into a world class soccer player. That was dream was thwarted pretty quickly when she broke a bone at age 5 and decided she would never play a contact sport again. From the "hanging out" days, I can remember sitting on Bee's bed, talking about anything and everything that came to mind-- she is a great listener and I think anyone who knows me knows that I have opinions to be heard. As for the 'chillin' days, well, they've had their ups and downs. Life has happened as we have grown up; there have been challenges that didn't exist as little kids. But even through the ups and downs, Bee is still there, my right-hand-chic and I am positive that the love and friendship is as strong as ever. 

Bee is turning 16 today. Whoa. One thing I know about 16-year-old girls is that boys are attracted to them. Through my own ignorance I guess I overlooked this little fact? Needless to say, when the thought of Bee and boys comes to mind, uh, it kind of freaks me out... Everyone knows that dads and brothers are protective of their ladies-- poor Bee, she is going to have more protection than the pope. We always joke that Bee can't start dating until she is 40. This is clearly just silliness, Bee, if you're reading this, I say you can start at 35.

All jokes aside, I am proud to call Bee my best friend and my sister. I am sure that as we grow, neither of these titles will change. Bee is as loyal as they come. I honestly don't know where I would be without her constant love and support and I am lucky and blessed to have a person as amazing as Bee in my life.

Happy Birthday, Bee!

{We struggled with pictures here. Now the secret is out: Mary Beth is the resident photographer and we can barely blog without her help.}

Monday Morning Almanac

I find myself:

::noticing God's glory

We took a drive to Front Royal on Saturday. As always, the lovely Blue Ridge delivered a glorious autumn show. Have I ever mentioned how much I love living in Virginia? Oh, well, maybe a few times;-).

::listening to 

Amy Grant. We've grown up together. 

{Nicky's prized possession, relocated to a new room.}

::clothing myself in 

Khaki pants, a long-sleeved t-shirt, a blue denim jacket rolled at the cuffs, and a handmade Anna Maria Horner voile scarf.

::talking with my children about these books

Pinkalicious. The littlest in this house pulls rank now and then (she outranks us all) and everyone does what she says. Her room is now cotton-candy pink, with one purple wall to appease Karoline. 

::thinking and thinking

About my mission. I clearly have not posted 31 days in a row, but I am reaping in a big way from this study. I'll update you later today. I'm amazed and grateful for the wild ride God has taken along with me as I look anew at vocation. While I'm 22 days into the prayer and meditation, I've only completed 10 posts. I promise I'll finish the whole 31 posts.  In time. Thanks for your patience.

{my view when I open my eyes in the morning}

::pondering prayerfully

“My present trial seems to me a somewhat painful one, and I have the humiliation of knowing how badly I bore it at first. I now want to accept and to carry this little cross joyfully, to carry it silently, with a smile in my heart and on my lips, in union with the Cross of Christ. My God, blessed be Thou; accept from me each day the embarrassment, inconvenience, and pain this misery causes me. May it become a prayer and an act of reparation." ~Elisabeth Leseur

::carefully cultivating rhythm

The last few weeks, rhythm was squashed into oblivion. We had birthday week, two orthopedic emergencies, a totalled car (unrelated to either orthopedic issue), Mike traveling, and a house full of contractors all day, every day, for two weeks. I was rocked to my introverted core. This morning, everyone is walking without a limp, my house is squeaky clean, I have dinner planned, and we will have a peaceful, planned day. God willing. Please, God, be willing!

::creating by hand

Drapery fabric is on the way! We're going to begin as soon as it gets here. In the meantime, I'm knitting away (very slowly) on my California shawl, helping Katie sew a blouse, and committing to getting those blocks finished for the anniversary quilt. Happy, happy, happy to knit and sew! I recognize how important these handworks are to me and how necessary it is that I plan time for them. 

{old curtains, new spot for them}

::learning lessons in

Oh, those Mama lessons! What a school for souls this vocation is! I'm learning that I still have much to learn. I messed up bigtime during birthday week and completely missed communicating in the love language of one of my children. I'm not sure either of us will ever fully recover. I'm still gulping the lump in my throat

::encouraging learning 

It's long been known to me that children learn at their own pace. That's one of the reasons we chose to homeschool. Friends, at long last, my most challenging student of all is cranking along and "getting" math. This means I am unexpectedly spending hours a day sitting next to him, working through college math, but I'll take it!

And I think that purgatory might be a place where one fills in all the teacher/school/counselor/parent forms on the Common App and repeatedly gets the error message every single time she saves. 

::begging prayers

for my peace of heart and others' gentle forgiveness as I try to catch up on things let go during the firestorm of the last couple weeks. I let more than a couple people down and I'm going to need a huge infusion of grace to regain equilibrium.

{the wall still awaits the icons, but we have a little pocket of peace here}

::keeping house

The middle and top floor of my house are perfectly clean. Every nook and cranny, wall and window, drawer and closet. Every flat surface above the floor has a new coat of paint and I so love the colors that surround me. Now, it's time to implement a new chore system, taking into account that in the next few weeks, two of the three big boys will leave our home. Nick and Stephen will go from sharing a room all their lives to each having their own rooms. We did a little switch preemptively. Nicky shares a room with Stephen, but he has always wanted to share a room with Paddy. When we learned he was leaving early for UVa, we moved Nick in with him and Michael in with Stephen. Michael is moving out in early December. This way, Nicky gets his much-adored roommate from now until he goes in January and then every time he comes home from college. It's just weird to think how huge this house is going to seem without them...

I've tried to capture a few images of the new colors, but I haven't gotten the hues true at all. Maybe next time.

 

{so good to have a functioning kitchen again, first thing in the morning}

::crafting in the kitchen 

I'm going back to a solid three week paleo meal plan. I'm really, really happy about this. I see its benefits and I'm committed to making it a habit for the long haul. My kids seem fairly happy with it, too. I think some nearly-paleo chocolate chip cookies helped. Recipes forthcoming. I've been Instagramming pictures of things we all are happy to eat. Follow me there, if you like. I'm heartofmyhome. You can also click on the little button at the top of the righthand column with the camera. This works even if you don't have an Instagram account.

 I registered to begin the Whole30 again. From the beginning of Lent until mid-June, I was following this diet for hypothyroidism, more or less. Then Kristen Kill mentioned to me she was doing Whole 30. They sounded essentially the same and I found a lot of support for the hypothryoid diet on the Whole30 pages, so I did Whole30 in July. I made it to Day 26 and then caved for a grain-free, dairy-free and utterly fabulous cookie. I went Whole 30+ from August 1 until our California trip and then I added wine and a little sushi rice. But I was really vigilant about all else while in California. And I was feeling well and very much seeing a difference.

When I returned home, I messed up bigtime. Birthday week and two weeks of non-functioning kitchen, and I  just didn't have the discipline to withstand either the unpredictable messes and crises or the abundant sugar at hand. I have paid dearly. On a couple days, my joints have hurt so badly, I've struggled to do the simplest things to move about the day. And there have been days my hands were so stiff that the thought of keyboarding anything has brought me to tears. I'm convinced that this way of eating is non-negotiable for me. I started Whole30 all over again. It took a few days to even get to functional again, but the past couple of days have been much better. I'm in for life. I have to be.

::loving the moments

when I have time to talk with my husband.

::giving thanks 

for the good men who have shared my home these last few weeks. They've worked so hard and cared so much about doing an excellent job. Their handiwork blesses us abundantly and we're so grateful to have gotten to know them. 

living the liturgy

Have you heard about the Advent Workshop? Do come hang out with us! Even if you're not local, click over and let me know your favorite Advent resources. I really need your help, y'all.

And...I'm doing a happy dance. Our mission has relocated daily Mass (again, I know). This time, it's five minutes away with no chance of traffic. Happy, happy, happy! This my friends, is truly living liturgy!

 

::planning for the week ahead

Mary Beth will be Sweet Sixteen on Tuesday. While I have a few thoughts in mind for this day, I'm interested to know how you celebrated your sixteenth birthday. Does your family have any traditions for your daughters? Ideas? 

{Mike completely renovated the foyer bathroom. Sarah helped him.}

{my new favorite place to sit}

On the Last Night of Being Five

Dear Sweet Karoline,

This night is fading into morning and soon it will be your birthday. You're curled up next to me and I watch you sleep. This is your "last night of being five." In the morning, it will be your sixth birthday. We'll go to tea together. Nicky will make you a four layer cake, exactly to your decorating specifications. Will that other front tooth come out? I think it might. 

But right now, in this moment, I want to capture you on the brink of tomorrow. Your sweet face, framed in curls, looks just enough like it did the day you were born that I can take myself back. Perfect baby. Every answered prayer in a sweet bundle with rosebud lips. You captivated everyone that day. We were forever changed. 

There is a collage of four black and white photographs of your newborn days that hangs at the top of the stairs. I stop, even if for only a moment, every. single. time. I never want to forget how I looked at you and knew that God had seen straight into my heart and smiled big when He handed you to me. 

For six years, you have danced your darling way through the life of our family. You are the first to soothe a hurt, whether it's a little sister with a stubbed toe or a big brother with a broken heart. You feel them all and you work your magic to make it all better. 

Ever generous with a hug and a smile, you exude genuine friendliness to every one you meet. You expect the best of people and you look for it so hard that you are rarely disappointed. Sarah Annie considers you her best friend. She is one really blessed little girl. There is no better friend.

You love creation and you love the Creator. You've never met a turtle or a bug or a bird or a bunny that you didn't want to adopt forever. Most nights, your pockets are full of acorns and pebbles and you are always Most Likely to Hide Sticks in the Car so you can bring them home. Sometimes Daddy tries to stop you. Usually those big blue eyes persuade him otherwise.

And God. Oh, how you love your Jesus! He is real and dear to you. You are our walking reminder on the ordinary days, in the ordinary moments, that God is near; God is here. Very matter-of-factly, you just beam it. And we believe it because everything about you says it's so.

Every night, you fall asleep with your feet touching mine. Usually, you start in your bed and then, sometime before morning, you and your kitty pillow find their way into the big bed in my room. You curl up in the middle, seeking Daddy's comfort, and you manage to stretch out across much more than half the mattress. And we don't mind. No, we don't mind at all.

Because we know how blessed we are to linger for a few moments in the loveliness of five and to awaken in the morning to the hope and promise and utter joy that is six.

 

Preparing for the Feast of St. Therese

~repost, because that's what we can do with traditions.

If you've ever been to my house, chances are excellent to 100% that you have seen one of these prayer cards laying around. I ordered them in bulk when Karoline Rose was born to include in her birth announcements. And I've ordered more every year since. The rose novena is most definitely how we begin to prepare for the feast of this saint, who is so, so dear to our family. Karoline's name, of course is a tribute to St. Therese's promise to shower roses upon the earth and Karoline tells everyone she knows that she is, indeed, a rose sent from heaven. Katie was baptized Kirsten Therese, so she, too, is named for St. Therese. And there is lots of evidence of her presence on this blog because there is lots of evidence of her presence in our lives as a family.

We will go to Mass, of course, to celebrate with the Universal Church. There will be roses. Michael is Katie's godfather and buys her miniature roses ("Little Flowers") on this day--just as long as I remind him;-). For this year, the girls are all abuzz about this pan, I purchased last summer. So, a rose-shaped cake. But I'm still not sure what the recipe will be. Any suggestions would be most welcomed in my inbox. Extra points if you have a grain freen recipe that works in a pan like this. It's a season for miracles, no?

One of Trish's candles (in that amazing St. Therese rose scent) will be lit before the icon. Mary Beth took Therese as her confirmation name and Patrick's godmother blessed her with this beautiful image.

 

I have learned over time that this is one feast I do not overplan, despite the fact that it is huge day in our family. St. Therese has a history of showering us with her love in most unexpected ways.

The novena begins September 23, to prepare for the October 1st feast.

*September 23 is the feast of our favorite Capuchin, St. Padre Pio. In our house, that means cappucino all around:-)

A Ridiculously Long Yarn Along

~California Car Knitting~

Hello, there! I haven't yarned along in a long, long while. It's good to be knitting again. In a most encouraging note, Beth observed that the old ladies at the quilting store and the yarn shop have gnarled arthritic hands. And still, they create their art with them. (Seriously, Beth herself is such an inspiration. She knits and quilts and trains for a  triathalons--all with arthritis.). So, I'm knitting. It hurts in the beginning and I can't go for very long at at all, but I'm doing it. 

I started a much bigger version of this shawl while in California. I chose the yarn ahead of time--a Pakucho cotton in Forest. Pakucho cotton is 100% organically grown in Peru by rural artisan and Indian farmers, using sustainable methods, on small farmyard plots. And it's entirely fair trade. But, wait! There's more. It's not dyed. It's naturally colored yarn that grows in eight earthy colors. Colored cotton has grown in Peru for 4,500 years but it's recently been revived. Intrigued? Read all about it here.

The poet in me was pretty thrilled when my yarn perfectly captured my impression of the hues of California's landscape. It's a lovely gray-green-with-a-touch-of-brown.

I've made a little--just a little- progress on it since arriving home. I'm still settling into a workable fall routine and part of that is seeing where my knitting pockets are. I finished reading Interrupted on the trip. I have to admit that I was very inspired by  7: An Experimental Mutiny Against Excess and very bothered by Interrupted. [Caveat: among the heavy influences listed in Interrupted was Richard Rohr.]. What bothered me, I think, was the impression that somehow we are all called to flee the suburbs and serve the poor somewhere else. After reading the book, I looked at my homeschooling-mother-of-many-life and wondered if I wasn't totally missing the mark because I wasn't feeding the hungry in Africa or at least in downtown DC. Somehow, taking a baby from a weary mom at our dance school and rocking her for awhile didn't seem as worthy as rocking an orphan in Ethiopa. But God loves that mom at dance and He loves that baby, too. There are spiritually starving people right here in my midst. I know them and He calls me to love them well. To love them wholeheartedly. Some of us might be called to encourage and love and educate and support and feed and disciple right here in the midst of the minivans. Interrupted distracted me from my vocation. I don't think that was the author's intention. I think it was my overzealous interpretation. There's probably much more to say about that. I tend to get distracted...

Other things that try to distract me from hearth and home and this needy bunch of kids who all look astonishingly like my husband are opportunities to write and speak and work in the online and between-the-covers world of Christian publishing and ministry. In order to go to California, I had to say "I'm sorry, I can't do that." Again. Twice. I couldn't go to the Catholic New Media Conference in Dallas, despite prior plans to do so. And I couldn't join Sally Clarkson and the other writers from MomHeart at Sally's home for a leadership intensive.  Both were good things. Very good things. A week in California with my husband? It was the better thing. It was the thing God intended for me. Sally was so very encouraging when I told her about the trip. And I know she's held me in her heart and her prayers. So, I'm revisiting my copy of The Ministry of Motherhood.

I can hear Sally's voice reminding me that God calls me home. I keep saying "no." Or "not just yet." Just as I was certain all those many years ago that God was calling me to raise a large family for His Glory, I am reminded that He still wants me here. There are many, many opportunities to serve Him in my neighborhood and on the soccer field and even in the grocery store. My children are learning to recognize those opportunities right alongside me. I am still wholeheartedly investing in my home and family because my family still needs me. Their needs are numerous and important and my job is far from finished. This is my Africa. 

Join Ginny for more yarns: