By the Grace of God

From Small Steps for Catholic Moms, May 15:

Think:
He who knows the comforts that come through the gift of grace and knows also how sharp and painful the absence of grace is will not dare think that any goodness comes from himself, but he will openly confess that of himself he is very poor and naked of all virtue.—Thomas a Kempis (Imitation of Christ)

Pray:
Show me, Jesus, the work of your hands. Bring me to my knees and give me the words to ask for your grace. Shed light on the dark places of my soul and burn away the muck. Infuse me with your goodness and help me to grow in virtue.

Act:
Page through photo albums with a child today. Share with him the moments of grace in your life. Be brave! Talk openly about the times you were afraid and how God brought good out of bad situations. Don't assume your children know the stories. Tell them!

Grace isn't really a virtue in the usual sense of the word. Grace is a gift-- a gift from God that enables the pursuit and acquisition of virtue. Without grace, we are helpless, hopeless. With grace, we are comforted, consoled, emboldened, empowered.

People ask me all the time how I do what I do. I'm always grateful when that's how it is phrased: how do you do what you do? It's a much easier question to answer than how do you do it all? I don't do it all, so to answer that particular question, I first have to explain that I don't even attempt to do it all. By that time, the questioner has lost interest because what she really wanted to know is how I do what I do. The answer there is Grace. By The Grace of God.

Nothing else. Nothing more. Certainly nothing less. When I look at the times in my life that were most peaceful, most content, even most productive, those are the times when I can see God's grace most at work. They weren't necessarily physically healthy times or tangibly productive times. They were the times when my soul was closest to God. When I knew, knew beyond a shadow of a doubt, that He was working and He was providing and He was completely in charge. The reality is that those times are times when I felt most out of control.

Tumor growing in my chest, threatening to stop the beating of my heart and the filling of my lungs?

I am powerless. Only God.

Baby growing above the placenta instead of safely below it or beside it, life-threatening hemmorage almost inevitable? I am powerless. Only God.

Four children eight and under, including two nursing babies, with a traveling husband?

I am powerless. Only God.

Dark, dark depression?

I am powerless. Only God.

In the moment--those moments-- I didn't see the grace. Perhaps, immediately, there was very little. Instead, He allowed me to feel the sharp and painful absence of grace. Sometimes, He left me there for long, long months, even years. He allowed me the precious gift of knowing that I am small and weak and I cannot live this life under my own power. He allowed me to need Him and long for Him and beg His mercy and His grace. Then, when I could not even rise from my knees, I could pray. Could beg grace. Could see the gift of the Church in the sacraments, real and actual grace available for nourishment of my soul. To confess, to be annointed, to receive Him bodily, God in His mercy provides these for the mother, the woman, who cannot truly live as He intended without the Grace of God.

And He gives us something else. In the in-between times, the times away from the church building, the every day of living, He gives us His Word. Nurtured and nourished by the sacraments, we receive regular infusions of the grace of scripture. A slow, steady drip of grace day and night, constantly watering our souls so that they are not sharp and painful and brittle.So that they are not fragile and tentative.  A day hemmed in God's word does not unravel. It doesn't. And so I've learned. The sharp and painful absences have taught me. They have taught me that there are tender non-negotiables.

To awaken early enough in the day to steep my soul in God's Word is to recognize He is the Master of my days, my moments. To read His love, to hear Him, to let those words become a part of me is to fully awaken to the day He intends. To memorize those words so that I carry them about with me throughout my daily round, so that they come readily to my mind and to my lips, to be unafraid to utter them aloud is to live a life of grace that is readily identified and genuinely appreciated by those I touch.

Grace.

I can see it. When I look back, it is obvious. The work of His hands. The unmistakable mark of His love on my life.

God, grant me the grace to see it--to seize it--in the now.

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Baby Surprise Jacket: Increases

Guest post by Elizabeth DeHority

We left off doing decreases until we got to 90 stitches on our needles.  You can look at your pattern to tell you how many rows you were supposed to have done, but I have no doubt that any mother who has more than one child helping her knit might have any number of rows knit so far.  Guess what!  It really doesn't matter, it all ends up folding up right no matter what.

 

 

This is not a mini pink BSJ.  This is an oddly shaped swatch.  Have I ever told you I LOVE to swatch?  I am so totally a process knitter.  It's the sensory experience, the colors and the textures that matter to me, not so much the finished garment.  Except for Rosary socks.  I'm good at finishing Rosary socks :-)

 

See those two diagonal lines?  They are INCREASES, not the decreases we've been doing.  We have many choices about how to do our increases.  They all work out just fine, so if there's any particular method you feel comfortable with, go right ahead.  I thought you might like to see how similar they end up, though.  The diagonal on the right was made with the same "knit into the front and back of the stitch" (KFB) that we used for the increases above the cuff.  The one on the left is the original Elizabeth Zimmermann Make One  (M1) increase.  Let's look at both for a minute.

 

 

I do the KFB increase, without leaving a regular knit stitch in between, because for me it's fast and easy.  I like only having to move one marker, and it seems less fiddly to me.  Of course you can also do the KFB sort of increase WITH a stitch in between, so that your diagonals for the increases will line up perfectly centered with your diagonals for the decreases.  It totally, truly doesn't matter. 

 

 

 {Elizabeth Foss' increases, using two stitch markers, knit front and back increases, and a knit stitch between the two increase stitches. My thanks to Ginny for talking me through this part. I couldn't reach Elizabeth DeHority, so Ginny and I talked it to death. In the end, these increases look just like the Chloe ones I know and love, so I settled comfortably into a very familiar pattern. -EF}

 

 

But here is the original EZ M1 increase.  Note that this is NOT the same one as in the video.  EZ liked to do her M1 by making a backwards loop over the right needle... if you have the pattern in The Opinionated Knitter you can find this info in the little box on page 102.  (Don't worry, we have our own video.  Just keep reading a minute first.  Breathe. )  If you choose this kind of increase, you might want to leave the single knit stitch between your increases, because two loops right next to each other can get a little too tight and hard to work on the next row.  The downside is that you need to move two markers.  Some people I know (Hi, Mrs. Foss!!!)  love their orderly stitch markers, so this might not trouble them. 

 

I think they look remarkably similar in garter stitch.  In the stockinette stitch part of my swatch, you can see the differences, both are fine... so for this BSJ project, just go with the one that is easier on your hands and your brain.  I guess it would be good to do both sides the same, but if you want to experiment and you're not a swatcher, this would be a good project to try out any increases you've read about...

 

And we'll keep going at these increases for a while... see your pattern for our target number of stitches where we add ten, evenly spaced across the back... This implies that we actually know which section is the back...  it's hard to see it yet, but it's actually just the part in the middle, between the diagonals.  Count your stitches BETWEEN the stitch markers, or pairs of stitch markers, divide by ten, and remember that number.  I'm not telling you how many stitches between your markers out of respect for the copyright, but also, because, honestly, truly, your counts really might be different from mine by several stitches and I don't want you to stress or rip back.   

 

So anyway, remember that number?  The divided by ten one?  Let's say it was six point something or other.  You can increase ten stitches evenly enough by doing five knit stitches, then a KFB in the sixth one. therefore turning every group of six stitches into seven.  What about the leftover ones?  Don't worry.  When you get to the markers for the increases, stop counting and just increase as you've been doing. 

 

 

And we'll keep doing this until we get to the part where we cast off for the front of the neck.  That's where our next BSJ post will start. 

 

I promised you a video tutorial for decreases, though.  Here's the link.  

Yarn Along: Praying As We Go

Hi there! I'm still knitting along with lots of friends, stitching a Baby Surprise Jacket.

Surprise! It's too big for my "baby." Looks like Karoline will wear this jacket before Sarah Annie does.  That's just fine with me; I was sort of sad that when Sarah outgrew it, it would be relegated to the giveaways or to my hope chest. Now, two little girls will wear it (unless Karoline wears it out). Still investigating exactly what this means in terms of adapting the pattern. And trying not to hyperventilate.

I'm reading Mysteries of the Jesus Prayer, by Norris Chumley. This has been a bit of a serendipitous read. Before the book arrived, I was looking to settle into a rhythm of knitting and praying when I am away from my audio Bible. A little digression: when I was being treated for cancer, I discovered that I had just enough time while they zapped me with radiation to pray three Hail Marys, followed by imploring St. Elizabeth, mother of John the Baptist, to pray with me that I would be able to conceive, carry, bear, and raise healthy, happy, holy children. My third child born after those treatments, and first daughter, was named Mary Elizabeth. Ever since, I've keyed prayers to certain activities. For instance, I had different repetitious extamporaneous prayers for each of my labors.

My girls have all repeated the words, "in, around, through, off" as they've learned to knit--words that match the actions, marking motion with meaning. I have discovered that in exactly the time it takes me to knit a stitch, I can pray the ancient Jesus Prayer: "Lord Jesus Christ, Son of God,have mercy on me, a sinner." It fits just perfectly. It's rhythmic and contemplative and meaningful.There is an inner peace to be found in the rhythm of the prayers and the needles.

Chumley's book is a bit of a documentary in print, taking the reader to visits hermits and monks and nuns who share how the prayer is lived in their lives. The rich layers of the ancient prayer are revealed to the reader as they draw us into the practice of simple, simple prayer. Chumley writes, "The point is to try to maintain connection with God at all times, remembering that God is here with us at every moment. The practice of prayer and meditation helps us do that, uniting the inner core of our being, our soul, with God and with all the scattered parts of us."

Knitting and prayer. So simple.

Be sure to stop by and visit Ginny and see what other folks are knitting and reading.

Tutorials

            

No better friend than a brother...

Gifts. We count them, one by one, the birds and the flowers and the sunsets. And they sing to us of the greatest of God, of His gracious blessing of abundant beauty. 

Even more precious are the days when we can stop and truly appreciate the gift of relationship. Nicholas was stoic, but sad, when Patrick left home last fall. Caught between being completely thrilled as any nine-year-old soccer player would be at the mere mention of the National Team and being acutely aware that his hero and buddy was  plucked from his daily life, he has struggled through the year. He is Patrick's biggest fan, but really, he just wants him to come home and play with him. In these last few weeks before the grand adventure comes to a close, Mike made a superhuman effort and got Nicky down to Florida to visit Patrick. So, this week, we count the gifts of brothers, together in the sunshine.

 ~a sporty red rental car to toodle around on the gulf coast~

~a hug (or two or three)~

~a chance to see where Patrick has been living and training, up close~

~up-close view of  Saturday morning training session~

~a tour of the dorms. What's this? Patrick's "count down to home" calendar. Since the date to come home keeps changing though, we suspect the calendar is more about the picture than the numbers.~

 
    ~A much-needed haircut. Nicky only lets Patrick cut his hair.. Haircuts have been few and far between this year.~ 
 

~a tour of the school~

~A romp in the Gulf of Mexico. Sort of funny to look at these pictures since neither of them are big fans of swimming in the sea.~

~Perfect Sunday seaside~

It has been said that the greatest gift you give your children is a sibling. 

All true.