Let go of self-recrimination. "There is still time for endurance, time for patience, time for healing, time for change. Have you slipped. Rise up. Have you sinned: Cease. Do not stand among sinners, but leap aside" (St. Basil the Great).
For a few minutes tonight, after your children are sleeping, kneel beside their beds. Let your breath rise and fall with theirs. Entrust them to the Father and thank Him for lending them to you.
Do not say, "In a minute" or "When I finish this" at all today. Instead, put aside your agenda and meet their needs (and even some wants) immediately and cheerfully.