In the Heart of my Home

Be Still

I'm at MomHeart this morning, reminding myself of the sweetness of being still with the Baby during Advent. Won't you please linger a few moments with me there?

St. Lucy's Day in the Morning

(Waiting. And trying so hard not to think about my to-do list)

Gingerbread Happy

Want to curl up with some beautiful books and dream of gingerbread? Here's an old post with lots of ideas so that you could do just that and even call it school. And here, are some truly wonderful books.

Gingerbread Friends

Gingerbread Baby

 

Amazing Grace in the Combox

(Just a favorite picture from Christmas past, because it makes me smile.)

Yesterday was not a good day. I woke up ridiculously early (Mike had a 5AM flight; that means leave the house before 4:00). I had this sense that I had utterly failed at everything I think is important in life. By noon, seven of nine children had confirmed that reality for me. I don't look to the internet for support and encouragement on days like those. Really, I don't look to the internet for support and encouragement ever, not since the years the locusts ate. I "know better." For me, the worse the day, the more I go quiet. Whether online or in person, I just don't want to talk.

Yesterday, I had a post waiting to publish. Most posts this month are already queued up and ready, one of my strategies for managing time. I had taken an old post, written a quick intro on the evening of December 6th, and not really given it much thought.

You all read that post and somehow, you knew. You knew exactly what to say. I got up this morning and read your memories, your traditions. And, one after another, they shone hope on a dark morning. I have no idea which way this day will go. I'm not overly optimistic. But I am ever so grateful for warm grace in the combox. I'm incredibly blessed by your memories and I'm surprised by unexpected hope. So, thank you. 

The Trouble with Traditions

The trouble with traditions is they change. Who knew? People grow. Families change. What once seemed like it would always be that way, isn't. One time. And then it isn't the next time. And then, you know. It's never going to be the same again.

The thing about a Christmas wedding? Those little changes come in big waves all through advent. And a mother knows it's all going to be very different, very soon. I've grown quite fond of stockings hung at the top of the stairs. The nine of them fill the space just perfectly and when I see them, I see a physical reminder of how abundantly blessed we are. Every time a baby was born, we added another stocking, with no small amount of glee. When Michael proposed to Kristin, I got her a stocking. I guess I just figured we were still adding to the family. I didn't consider logistics.

Logistics. How will this work, going forward? This December 6th tradition of stockings? Not so well. People won't be here on December 6th. One or more will be away at school, in the thick of exams, for the next forever many years. Too, they will move out altogether, with spouses and jobs and the impossibility to just be here in the morning on December 6th. Perhaps they will have their own children for whom to fill stockings.

The best traditions, it seems, must be open to change. And so, without further pondering on this particular reality this year, I hang the stockings--all nine together--one last time. I take a good picture (or at least I try). And I leave for you a memory of when we were still adding, whereupon me-at-40 and me-at-33 remind me-today of what it's all about.

First, from 2006:

It was an almost forgotten advent tradition. The phone call to Land's End. I used to be a major catalog shopper, back before I was a major internet shopper. One year, I called Land's End and ordered three monogrammed stockings. Two years later, new baby at my breast, I called again. And then again. And again, every two years, until there were seven. Last year, I hung those stockings and thought with a twinge of sadness how perfectly they fit in the spot we'd chosen--no room for another. A month later, I was pregnant! So, this year, I ordered a stocking online for Karoline. But I ordered the one with the snowmen and not the angel. The girls learned of this mistake and protested loudly. Apparently, the family tradition is that the girls all have stockings with angels. I didn't know that two stockings made a tradition. Seemed like a nice tradition, though. So, it turned out that I had to make a phone call after all. And the very kind lady on the phone said, "A baby at Christmas! How lovely!" I kid you not--after a year of blogging loveliness permeating this pregnancy, she said "lovely." Lovely. And the whole conversation reminded me of this column, written in 1999:

~~~

 

It was the weekend following Thanksgiving. My husband was traveling. I had nearly finished my Christmas shopping. And I had spent a couple of hours on the phone, bouncing back and forth between various members of my extended family; the first of several rounds of Christmas coordination calls. I was trying again to plan our Christmas celebrations, taking into account the visitation schedules of siblings and step-siblings. I was determined to have the perfect Christmas this year: everyone together to celebrate (except those who wouldn’t be civil to each other) and a revival of some fond traditions of childhood Christmases (without stepping on the toes of people who have found new spiritualities). In my mind, all these criteria could be met. This could be perfect. I hung up after round one, my head and neck tense, my soul weary. It didn’t feel remotely like Christmas and I had serious doubts that it would this year. I had one more call to make before I would call it a day. I needed to order a stocking for Stephen’s first Christmas.

All my children have monogrammed needlepoint stockings and he would too. I called the catalog company and placed my order. "And I want to have it monogrammed," I said. "What should it say?" inquired the calm voice on the other end. "Stephen," I replied, tears springing unexpectedly to my eyes. "A baby at Christmas," she said. "That’s what it’s all about isn’t it?" In this space over the course of this year, I have reflected often upon how Stephen has shown me that God is bigger. He is bigger than any plan I have and He is bigger than worry or anxiety. I am a planner and God has shown me this year that only His plans are the perfect ones. Thoughts of Stephen at Christmas brought thoughts of another Christmas baby.

I am quite sure that Christ’s birth wasn’t exactly the perfect Christmas Mary planned. I cannot even imagine a donkey ride nine months pregnant, in the throes of early labor. Caves full of animals stink. Hay makes me sneeze; I wonder if at least one person gathered on that night wasn’t wheezing. And in the tired, hazy, sweet hours after childbirth, when most women want to rest and just gaze at the fruit of their labor, the holiest woman of all was visited by smelly, dirty strange men and their sheep! The Blessed Mother was truly the ultimate gracious hostess. Exactly who is coming for Christmas? The Son of God.

I think that I am the perfect hostess called to juggle the needs and wants of competing interests. I think I have to find the perfect gift for everyone on my list and wrap it in the perfect paper. I think we need to stick to the traditional twelve course Italian feast or I will disappoint my late grandmother. (Truth be told, my grandmother would have been so thrilled with all my children, she wouldn’t have cared about food at all.) I think I have to have a perfectly decorated house that smells of Christmas, despite my asthmatic children. Advent isn’t supposed to be a marathon of materialism and merrymaking. Christmas isn’t also known as "the feast of cooking, cleaning, and shopping."

Christmas is a time to be Christ to one another. It is permission in a largely secular society to witness to the wonders of the Lord. In reality, the only thing perfect about Christmas is the Christ Child who longs to find shelter in our hearts.

I am not Martha Stewart. I am an innkeeper. I am preparing a place in my home and in my soul for the Savior of the World. I need to be so grounded in prayer that Christ’s peace overflows from me to those in my home. Let the visitors come. Let them come whenever they want and stay as long as they want. I will make the house warm and the food filling, but above all, I will make certain that the Holy Infant is here. He will be the reason for our celebration. If He can cause the lion to lie down with the lamb, He can handle Christmas at my house. Despite all the other things on my list, I must make time for earnest, fervent prayer, because I know that I can’t do this under my own strength. I must invite the Baby. The only perfection here this year will be the Baby. Because a Baby at Christmas is what it’s all about.

 

How To Help Children Truly Be Merry

It is generally acknowledged that the holiday season can be difficult for adults. This time of year, headlines at the newsstands tout all sorts of ways to “bust stress.” Ironically, one of the suggestions is often to look at the holiday through “the eyes of a child.” But holidays can be very stressful for children, too.

 

Consider the child who is anxious about whether or when he will see an estranged parent. Consider the child whose parent has an addiction. Consider the shy child who would really prefer to stay at home with only his immediate family. Consider the child who likes his routine. Consider the child with autism, sensory integration, or other neurological challenges. The hullabaloo and the expectations of the season only accentuate the very real stresses that exist for these children.

My favorite parenting author, Mary Sheedy Kurcinka, writes in Kids, Parents, and Power Struggles,
"Stress sneaks up on us, and as a result we often don't even realize it's taking its toll.  Kids never say, ‘Gee, Mom or Dad, I'm really hurting.’  Instead they throw tantrums, hit their siblings or the neighbor kids, forget their homework, start having toileting accidents... complain of headaches and stomachaches and refuse to sleep in their own bed or go upstairs alone."

"And to make matters worse, 90% of their stress is tied to our own."

Children sense our tension. We compound it with disruptions in routines, sleep deprivation, and all sorts of poor eating adventures. And, though we certainly don’t set out to, we put pressure on them, too. They know they are supposed to be happy and they are troubled when the party that is supposed to be fun is really very trying. They know they are supposed to behave especially well in front of Great Aunt Hilda and instead they have a total meltdown.

 

Kurcinka writes, "Holidays and traveling are supposed to be fun, which is why the stress they create can sneak up on you.  You want to ignore it.  You're supposed to be having fun, but the disruption of routines, guests and new foods can raise stress levels quickly and leave you in full view of all of the relatives or the public at large dealing with a kid flooded with cortisol."

Is there a child in your family who is especially sensitive to his environment, who is more perceptive, needs more structure, feels more intensely? That’s the child who needs your care even more this time of year. Is there a child in your neighborhood who is missing a divorced parent right now? Who is wondering if the adult in his life can stay sober through December? He’s dreading Christmas. What can you do to help the littlest of God’s children to really experience the joy of the season?

Kurcinka suggests that during times of stress we need to:

1. Nurture more and to recognize the child’s need to be nurtured. For a child of your own, this might mean being especially attuned to what is important for his own calm. Does he absolutely need ten hours of sleep at night? Make no exceptions; guarantee sleep. And rub his back at the end of the day, ensuring he will drift off peacefully. Is the huge family gathering and the peppering of questions more than his shy, sweet mind can manage? Limit yourself to smaller gatherings, rehearse responses, and rescue him when he’s cornered by well-meaning relatives and blushing a deep crimson that puts Santa’s suit to shame. Be there. Hold him. If he’s an infant or a toddler, hold him almost all the time. Rock and sing. Rock and read. If he’s older, sit and cuddle in the quiet with a good Christmas story.

Limit television. It’s far too easy to plug a child in so we can go get “something productive” accomplished. This works against us. The child is now wired and he’s not feeling nurtured. We’ve pushed him away and we’ve fueled his stress with a medium that usually does little or no good for a needy child. Let some of your own expectations of appearances go in order to be very available to your child.

Kurcinka writes:  "Stress disrupts our basic sense of security, and your child needs you to help her feel secure, just like you did when she was a baby.  And she needs you to do it proactively… Proactively means recognizing the stress behaviors and the situations that cause stress for your family and consciously making the decision to slow things down and nurture more...Little things such as asking your child to help, or offering to carry him before he asks you to. It's essential that you offer support before your child asks for it because by doing so you allow him to make the decision:"Yes, I need support right now," or "No, I can do this on my own."  He feels empowered and secure.

As you work with your child take the time to savor his presence.  Revel in the memories of your child's infancy... Absorb the joy he finds in being with you.  These small, thoughtful actions and words will communicate loudly and clearly to your child, "I am here.  I am available.  You can trust that I will not abandon you in your distress."

There are children whose parents cannot nurture. They are not physically present or they are emotionally unable. Look for those children in your life. Offer to bake with them, include them in a family meal, share a good book, be a safe haven. The child will absorb the nurturing environment in your house. He will feel safe. And to some, degree, he will take the safe feeling with him. Make a particular effort to include those children when you are doing something faith-based. Something as simple as watching your family light an advent wreath can inspire in the child a lifetime desire to live the liturgical year. There is no greater gift you can give than to nurture a child whose own parents cannot.

2. Create stability and predictability where you can.

You know the rituals of every day life that are important to your children. Make sure they don’t get pushed aside for a whole season of special occasions. A story every night at bedtime becomes even more important when it is the trigger for a good night’s sleep after an over-extended day. Post a calendar and talk about the plans for Advent and Christmas. Count down days to events and be certain that the child knows exactly what is coming and when. Remember, they don’t hold the iCal app; they are not masters of their own time. And they are completely at your mercy to know what comes next and how to cope.

 

 

3. Create rituals that connect you.

This is a beautiful season of rituals. As Catholics, our holy mother, the Church, has blessed us with a treasure chest of rituals and traditional celebrations of feasts. Don’t do them all. Instead, choose wisely. Do only those things which will bring you closer to each other and closer to God. Your goal is to connect to your child and to share the wonder of the Christ Child. Keep that goal at the forefront. Take the Blessed Mother as your role model. Make it a season of nurturing and gentle kindness and let the children come to you for safe haven and holy passage.

needle & thREAD

I actually have more drapes to show you, but I think I'll wait until after Christmas, when the decorations have been boxed and returned to their shelves. For now, I'm pretty tickled to tell you about an old project, now finished. Last year, in late November, Deborah at Whipstitch offered me an opportunity to take her online quilting class. I knew how busy this time of year is and I knew it was carzy to commit to a class, but I also knew the phenomenal teacher Deborah has been to me. I jumped at the chance.

I worked hard to keep up and I completed all the squares. Deborah encouraged me to back and bind and finish, lest my quilt forever decorate the shelf in my sewing room. It taunted me from that shelf all year. Then, in a wonderful moment of serendipitous happy, my very first sewing teacher, my friend, Cari, swept it into her competent hands. A week later, she brought it back, quilted and bound.

I love this quilt. Love it. I love how happy it looks. I love how much I fussed over every single piece of fabric sewn into it. I love how when I ask for help, the love of friends magnifies anything I can do alone. 

So that's the sewing for the week. We're actually talking about my recent reading in yesterday's post. Lots of people leaving me more reading to do. And I'm dreaming CSAs (at least I did last night).

{I have real pictures on my real camera. Alas, I cannot find the cord. So, more Instagram. My New Year's resolution is to become a real photographer. More on that next week, I think. For now, thanks for your patience with iPhone pictures.}

So what's happening out there in needle and thread world? Are you working on Christmas presents? Christmas decorations? Winter jammies? Do tell.  

Make sure the link you submit is to the URL of your blog post or your specific Flickr photo and not your main blog URL or Flickr Photostream. Please be sure and link to your current needle and thREAD post below in the comments, and not a needle and thREAD post from a previous week. If you don't have a blog, please post a photo to the needle & thREAD group at Flickr. 

       Include a link back to this post in your blog post or on your flickr photo page so that others who may want to join the needle and thREAD fun can find us! Feel free to grab a button here (in one of several colors) so that you can use the button to link:-)

 

Answering Christmas Questions

 

Good morning! I'm mining the archives today to answer one of the questions that keeps popping up. Before we get to that, a quick answer to another.

Do you decorate your house and put up your tree for Christmas before Christmas, during Advent?

And the answer is: Yes. Yes, I definitely do. When I am expecting a baby, I ready the environment well before my due date. I wash and fold tiny clothes. I freshen the co-sleeper. I find the carseat inserts. I rearrange bedrooms or dressers, as necessary. And I pretty much clean my house from top to bottom and stock the freezer and pantry. It's what I do. I do it knowing that I labor far more peacefully and my postpartum is much smoother when I have prepared my environment. On December 25, our family welcomes the Baby. Hearts and homes are prepared well in advance.

How do you do gifts and shopping and stuff for a family that big?

Wait! One more thing before we get to that answer. This advent is busier than ever for us, because we have a Christmas wedding sparkling on the horizon December 29. And my thyroid has decided this is a great time to flare, so, I'm going light on first-time content here in the next few weeks. But...I'm happy to find things I've shared in the past and freshen them with new photos, especially if they answer your questions right now. So keep asking please! Now, onto to the shopping and gifting strategy:

I buy for nine children, several godchildren, several nieces and nephews, three sets of grandparents, and assorted other people. But I think what you want to know about is how the Foss family handles Christmas presents in its own household.

I am a minimalist. Sort of.

Until 8 years ago, every child got a stocking and then three gifts (in honor of the wise kings bringing the Holy Infant three gifts). Eight years ago, we moved into this house the week before Christmas. That year, I had six children twelve and under, including a nursing baby, and we moved ourselves. I had to pack the entire household, move it, and unpack it again. If I held to three gift plan, I'd be hiding and then transporting 18 gifts for the children alone. The chance that something would be lost was keeping me up at night. The idea that all those piles had to be just right according to the formula struck me as ridiculous. As our family grew, keeping the numbers "fair and balanced" had started to take away from the meaningfulness of the gifts I was choosing. In an intentional effort to simplify, streamline, and become even more thoughtful, we made a decision to buy each child one meaningful (and a bit more costly gift) each instead of several gifts each. A tradition was born of necessity that year.

There is no towering mountain of presents on Christmas morning for my children to tear into with reckless abandon. But I am not a Scrooge. Far from it. We celebrate wholeheartedly.

And generously.

We fill stockings on St. Nicholas Eve and open them to celebrate his feast.Every child receives gifts from godparents and grandparents, most of which are opened at a big, extended family party in our home. Every child draws the name of a sibling for whom to buy a gift (with some help from Mama if they are small) and those are opened before dinner on Christmas Eve.Finally, there is one thoughtful gift for each child awaiting them when we return from Midnight Mass early Christmas morning.

Despite the numbers, I am not overwhelmed. More importantly, they are not overwhelmed. I don't encourage a big, long "I want" list. No effort is made to be sure that everyone's "pile" is equal in monetary value. Instead, Mike and I choose one gift that we know will speak to the child--one thing that we are sure will make them smile and let them know they were carefully considered in the choosing and the buying. It's a plan that works for us because we've found it to be beautiful in its simplicity.

 (psst: Those ties on the new drapes? The drapes are in training so they'll hang properly;-)

Think of it as Creative Therapy and Pockets of Peace

Mike was home for awhile yesterday. I gave him a crinkly rotary cutter and a yard of Kate Spain fabric and asked him to cut circles. An hour later, he commented out of the blue that he was in a very good mood. I quietly suggested that there is something to the idea that crafting is therapy. 

I don't look at this list of possiblities as a "to-do" list a busy whirl of a season. I look at it as pockets of quiet creative oasis. Maybe something here catches your fancy. A litle homemade Christmas is good for the receiver ...and the giver.

Happy creating.

Healing Salve (or hair gel, depending on how you use it)

Lemon Sugar Hand Scrub

Lavender Sugar Scrub

Peppermint Foot Scrub (super easy. smells great. Include coupons for home-spa pedicures and foot massages.)

 

Homemade Vanilla Bean Extract

Christmas Jam (this is beautiful and really yummy)

Cinnamon Honey Buttter (love things to put in adorable jars)

Oatmeal Cinnamon Bread Kit in a Cute Jar

Espresso Brownie Mix in a Jar

Pretzel Dots (Use Christmas M&Ms, but you already knew that)

Crazy Good Kiss Cookies

Mason Jar Meals (for a mom who is newly pregnant or about to deliver or postpartum or otherwise way too tired for this busy season)

Infused sugar

Felt Garland

Fun Scrap Garland

"Polaroid" Ornament

A Happy Place for Christmas Scraps

For the Birds

Scrappy Covered Journals

Cozy Heatable Therapy Bags (I think I'm going to mix in some lavender)

Amazing Nature Journals

Scripture Bookmarks

Homemade Beeswax Crayons 

Beautiful Bookpage Luminaria

Darling Repurposed Denim Do-It-All Bins

Tea Wreath for the Kitchen (I need this) 

Lord, Hear Our Prayer

The internet is a formidable force for bringing the comfort and consolation and hope of the Lord to all of us. It can be an incredibily powerful medium for community. There is an unfathomable resource for prayer here. We have on the 'net the privilege of praying for people and of being witness to the miracles brought forth when fervent, faith-filled people pray for one another.

Let's be that community of hope and faith for one another.

How about this idea? What if I pop in here every weekend, share Sunday's gospel and talk a wee bit about how we can live it and pray it in our homes? And then you tell me how we can pray for you that week? Deal?

{And please, do return and let us know how prayer is bearing fruit.} 

Gospel 

Luke 21:25-28, 34-36

Jesus said to his disciples:
"There will be signs in the sun, the moon, and the stars,
and on earth nations will be in dismay,
perplexed by the roaring of the sea and the waves.
People will die of fright
in anticipation of what is coming upon the world,
for the powers of the heavens will be shaken.
And then they will see the Son of Man
coming in a cloud with power and great glory.
But when these signs begin to happen,
stand erect and raise your heads
because your redemption is at hand.

"Beware that your hearts do not become drowsy
from carousing and drunkenness
and the anxieties of daily life,
and that day catch you by surprise like a trap.
For that day will assault everyone
who lives on the face of the earth.
Be vigilant at all times
and pray that you have the strength
to escape the tribulations that are imminent
and to stand before the Son of Man."

Think

You learn to speak by speaking, to study by studying, to run by running, to work by working; and just so you learn to love God and man by loving. Begin as a mere apprentice and the very power of love will lead you on to become a master of the art. ~St. Francis de Sales

Pray

God, I want this Advent to be about learning to love better. Help me to wait, watching. Let me guard my heart from all the modern carousing the culture begs of me during these days before Christmas. Let me stand firm against the temptation to succumb to the anxieties of my to-do lists. God, give me the strength to be vigilant and help me dedicate this advent to becoming a master of the art of love.

Act

Decide now. When will it be? Fifteen minutes every day, by yourself, between now and Christmas. Fifteen minutes to be still and know God. Fifteen minutes to love Him with your whole heart and listen to His lessons of love. Let this Advent be the beginning of the habit.

{Adding my own intentions here this week. Please pray for two dear friends--both battling breast cancer--who face major surgery this week. And please pray for an intention held close in my heart.}

Quick Advent Tour Through the Heart of my Home

Last year, I wrote a guest post highlighting our favorite Advent traditions. Here it is for you, today, a bit freshened, as it were.

 Advent is a treasured time of year for our family and our traditions are both old and new. From the time my oldest son was a very little boy (about 24 years ago), picture books have been the pegs upon which we’ve hung our advent celebrations. Those baskets of books have grown through the years and now, my littlest girl, just four years old,  listens to the same stories and celebrates with many of the same traditions. Every year, I think I can just add Advent to our regular routine. And every year, within a few days, I recognize that living Advent all day, every day, suits our family best. Over the years I’ve written several homeschool lesson plans ( Tomie de Paola and friends; Jan  Brett and more; Around the World; A Fairy Tale Christmas; for the young lady) , incorporating typical school subjects with our every day Advent life. And every year, our traditions change just a little bit as our family changes.

We usually begin our Advent celebrations the first weekend of Advent. We bring out the Advent wreath and other reminders that this is the season to prepare. Purple letters propped on the mantel are visual reminders that it is a season of getting ready—it’s not yet Christmas. Our favorite books for the first weekend are whimsical works of Tomie de Paola. We read all about Strega Nona’s preparation in Italy in Merry, Christmas, Strega Nona and Strega Nona’s Gift. And then, we read about the angels getting ready for a celebration in heaven in Country Angel Christmas. I always resolve to make sure that the Advent wreath is lit each night, which is really my resolution not to let Christmas preparations get so crazy that we don’t make time for quiet family meals. The length of those candles is my measure of mealtime success. If we burn a candle or two all the way down before Christmas, all the better.  Despite my best efforts, my children tell me that sometimes, it  feels like a crazy mess!

We light the candles with a song, adding one verse each week,

Light one candle for hope, one bright candle for hope, He brings hope to everyone. He comes! He comes!

Light one candle for peace, one bright candle for peace, He brings hope to everyone. He comes! He comes!

Light one candle for joy, one bright candle for joy, He brings hope to everyone. He comes! He comes! {Here we switch out the mantel letters for pink ones that spell “Joy” and we light the glass luminaria on the front porch which spell “Joy” also. The children know we’re getting very close.}

Light one candle for love, one bright candle for love, He brings hope to everyone. He comes! He comes!

 

Around December first, we trim our tree, placing it in a front window to light the evening and bear witness to our waiting. We read The Legend of the Christmas Tree. We also begin our Jesse Tree devotions. We’ve much enjoyed  Ann Voskamp’s meditations for several years now. We also place several manger scenes around the house. A favorite book to celebrate the appearance of the crèche in every nook and cranny here and there is The Christmas Miracle of Jonathon Toomey. There is a little bit of a war in our house about whether baby Jesus should be in the manger or whether he should be hidden until Christmas Eve. Some of the children think that he should be hidden since we’re waiting. But the wee ones want to re-enact the nativity again and again, so they need the Baby. My compromise is to ensure that the scenes which are safe for playing hands have Jesus to hold all through Advent.

 

On December 6^th, we read The Miracle of St. Nicholas and The Baker’s Dozen. The children are treated to stuffed stockings in the morning and we begin cookie baking that day. Clearly, my children understand that Santa Claus is a legend that began with a real man who served the poor. Because our stockings come early, they aren’t filled by Santa. They each will find, among other things, an ornament in their stockings.  When they are grown and have Christmas trees of their own, their ornaments will go with them. {Oh dear, I think I have a box to fill this year, don't I? I have not yet even thought about crying over this wedding. Somehow, the thought of boxing those ornaments and sending them off without the friends with whom they've hung all these years...tears gather. Ahem. Moving on.}

On December 12^th, we read The Lady of Guadalupe and enjoy Mexican hot chocolate. We share a traditional blessing with one another: May God be as good to you as He was to Juan Diego. Then, we usually have tacos for dinner.

My children love the Feast of St. Lucia, on December 13^th. We read  Hanna’s Christmas, a darling little story about a Swedish girl who is homesick in America. We talk about St. Lucy and we think it’s pretty cool that she’s an Italian saint who is beloved by Scandinavian countries. Since I am Italian and my husband is Scandinavian, she’s the perfect saint for our family! The girls awaken early and dress and make cinnamon rolls and hot chocolate for all the men in the house. They wear fabric crowns of holly and candles and delight in serving breakfast in bed. Because St. Lucy is the patron of light, that evening is the perfect one to drive around the neighborhood and admire Christmas lights.  Lucia, Saint of Light is the preferred bedtime reading.

On December 17^th, we begin to sing the O Antiphons. You might recognize them in the verses of O Come, O Come Emmanuel.My children know that Christmas is close indeed when we get our little Antiphon house out and begin to fill the rooms with golden cubes. Each Antiphon begins with "O" and addresses Jesus with a unique title which comes from the prophecies  and whose initials, when read backwards, form an acrostic for the Latin "Ero Cras" which means "Tomorrow I come."

For some reason I cannot remember, this is also time Peppermint Day. We make peppermint marshmallows and peppermint cocoa, peppermint bark and peppermint crackle cookies. We read  The Legend of the Candy Cane. And we begin to get really ready for the twelve days of Christmas which will begin on the 25^th.

 

Last year, my oldest son took to heart the dictionary definition of Advent: : onset, beginning, commencement, start.

And, he kept to the tradition of celebrating all the little advent feasts with a picture book. He wrote and illustrated a picture book for his girlfriend. At the book’s end, he asked her to marry him.

Advent: a beginning.

This year, we are all looking forward to a Christmas wedding on the weekend the Church dedicates to the Holy Family.

 Our Christmas celebration begins on Christmas Eve. Traditionally, my husband has taken my children to the wharf to buy seafood for our feast. My grandmother used to do this when I was a child.  While I have scaled down the traditional Italian Christmas Eve of seven fishes, I do still cook whatever ocean treasures they find and bring home. We go to Mass as a family and come home to open presents. Then, my children sleep well and linger long in their pajamas Christmas morning. The celebration has just begun.

St. Andrew Christmas Devotion Begins Today

 

Printable image here.

More notes here, here, and here.

Do you pray this prayer? I know of some amazing St. Andrew stories. If you have one and post it to your blog, please leave a link below. If you don't blog, please share your story in the comments.

One of my favorite stories ever. And it just gets better and better. Have you seen that baby lately?

I Think I Have a Plan

 

Karoline is perusing Christmas Around the World

Chris Scarlett sent me another wonderful annotated book list. Lots of the books on her list are family favorites of ours.  I've been trying to wrap my brain around a reading plan for Advent this year. Tomie de Paola and friends? Jan  Brett and more? Around the World? A Fairy Tale Christmas? So many options.

I spread all the books out on the floor to summon inspiration. Karoline and Sarah just starting oohing and ahhing. Old favorites. Just-noticed-for-the-first-times...

All so good.

On a whim, I decided to make a stack in order to wrap. We will unwrap one a day (two in some cases) and be sure that book gets the spotlight that day. Then, all the others and all the previously unwrapped ones can also be read on any given day. I know lots of people do this every year, but it's new for us. I reserved certain feast day books and our favorite Peppermint Day inspiration. I absolutely did not overthink this. Honestly, I mostly let Mary Beth do it. The big goal--the whole idea--is just be certain every book gets read at least once and to trust that the literature will work its way into their hearts and their warm memories.

I've got some meaty, longer read-alongs for knitting afternoons (I'll share those later). 

And I have some chapter books set aside for read-alones.

I'm making lists of homemade gifts supplies and plans for some crafting, but I'm determined to focus on cozy and calm. This year, I really want to focus on the books themselves and a few well-chosen meaningful gifts to make. I think this just might work this year. (Here's a super interesting study on children and giving. Really worth a careful look and some serious consideration. HT: Lisa Roder).

Below, I've mixed my thoughts in with Chris' notes. I'm sorry if this confuses some of you. Please think of it as the virtual version of two enthusiastic picture book lovers trying to tell you everything that excites them about Christmas books all at once:-). Lots to love here.

Early Advent:

 The Twenty-four Days Before Christmas, An Austin Family Story by Madeleine L'Engle, illustrated by Joe DeVelasco (few pictures, but a delightful story to stretch out from December 1-24)

 Waiting For Noel, An Advent Story by Ann Dixon, illustrated by Mark Graham (Family waiting for a birth in this and the previous title. I love to give this as a gift to families awaiting "Christmas babies." And I love to read it every year with my Christmas baby.)

 The Little Advent Book by Ida Bohatta, English version by John Theobald (sweet, tiny German book if you can find it)

Deck the Hall by Sylvia Long. (Fun, whimsically illlustrated book of the favorite carol. Pre-readers love to "read" it aloud because they know the song.)

Jesse Tree Companions:
Your favorite children's illustrated (or adult) Bible

 One Wintry Night by Ruth Bell Graham (Billy's wife), illustrated by Richard Jesse Watson (especially well done illustrations in this story that immerses us in a compressed version of salvation history from Creation to Easter)

General Nativity Themes:

 The Story of Christmas, words from the Gospels of Mathew and Luke, pictures by Jane Ray (do not miss these Eastern style paintings)

 The First Christmas by Rachel Billington, illustrations by Barbara Brown (very complete)

 The Christ Child, as told by Matthew and Luke, made by Maud and Miska Petersham (1931, might be hard to come by, but so worth a try)

 The Story of the Nativity by Elizabeth Winthrop, illustrated by Ruth Sanderson (brief, little intro for younger children)

King of the Stable, by Melody Carlson (A wealthy boy in biblical times learns the meaning of the Incarnation when he must leave his home to live with poorer relatives in Bethlehem--and ends up helping a certain couple who are about to have a very special baby.)

The Shepherd's Christmas Story, by Dandi Mackall (This is the story of the announcement that the Savior was born, described by a shepherd who was there.)

Bright Christmas, An Angel Remembers, by Andrew Clements (Clements  imagines a heavenly perspective on the birth of Jesus. The clever and colloquial text incorporates angel appearances from several Bible stories and hints at what it might feel like to be such a religious messenger. Kiesler's  soft oil paintings set the scene for biblical events with canvases of blue-black starlit nights and vast expanses of golden Middle Eastern desert. Worth the hunt to find this one.)

This next group of general Nativity tiltles would be especially nice to revisit on or near Christmas Eve.

Father and Son: A Nativity Story by Geraldine McCraughean (I'm so sad this is out of print. Do hunt it down. This quiet picture book imagines the thoughts and fears of Joseph as he reflects on the birth of the Christ child. Glowing illustrations offer a series of pleasant scenes, as Joseph envisions the baby growing to be a boy. Charming decorative borders add gracefully frame the pages).

The First Night by B. G. Hennessy, paintings by Steve Johnson with Lou Fancher (perfect for toddlers, preschoolers, or a Baby's First Christmas gift)

 One Special Star by Anita McFadzean, illustrated by Kate Jasper's (a counting book, from 10-1)

All For The Newborn Baby by Phyllis Root, illustrated by Nicola Bayley (nature-inspired lullaby)

 Christmas in the Barn by Margaret Wise Brown, pictures by Barbara Cooney (from two Grand Dames of children's lit)

 A Gift From St. Francis  by Joanna Cole, illustrated Michele Lemieux 

This is the Star, by Joyce Dunbar (lovely, lyrical story of everyone who was touched by the Star that night)

Christmas Gift of the Priesthood:

 
 King Island Christmas by Jean Rogers, illustrated by Rie Munoz (Eskimo story.  Will Fr. Carroll make it in time for Mass?)

 The Miracle of St. Nicholas by Gloria Whelan, illustrated by Judith Brown Don't miss this story of a Russian Christmas surprise. I dearly, dearly love this book. This year, with all the parts of our parish mission dispersed into various homes in the neighborhood, the book resonates all the more.

Inspired by Christmas Music (look for more on the Christmastide list):
Joy To The World! Carols selected by Maureen Forrester, illustrated by Frances Tyrrell (favorites and lesser-known songs with especially cute illustrations)

 And It Came To Pass by Jean Slaughter, illustrated by Leonard Weisgard (the Biblical account interspersed with snippets of carols, vintage 1971)

 Silent Night, The Song and Its Story by Margaret Hodges, illustrated by Tim Ladwig (I totally wish I could visit Austria some day.)

 Silent Night illustrated by Susan Jeffers, verses by Joseph Mohr (all the verses, lovely)

 Bring a Torch, Jeannette, Isabella, A Provencal Carol, pictures by Adrienne Adams (very Euro)

 The Huron Carol by Father Jean de Brebeuf, illustrated by Frances Tyrrell (Native American carol written by a Jesuit, great artwork) There's an MP3 here: The Huron Carol by Father Jean de Brebeuf

 'Twas In The Moon Of Wintertime, The First American Christmas Carol adapted by Roz Abisch, illustrated by Boche Kaplan (same song as the previous book with a completely different art style.  See which one your children prefer.)

Any version of The Nutcracker if going to the ballet is in your plans this year.  The Scarlett family has a commercial version that is kind of a Where's Waldo-inspired Nutcracker.  The Foss family has this one:

The Nutcracker, (this is a hefty coffee table book in classic Sendak style)

Nurturing Family-Oriented Themes (will work equally well during the Christmas season):

 Grandfather's Christmas Tree by Keith Strand, illustrated by Thomas Locker (survival in 1886 Colorado)

 The Year of the Perfect Christmas Tree by Gloria Houston, pictures by Barbara Cooney (I love this story of Dad's surprise return form the Great War.)

 My Prairie Christmas by Brett Harvey, illustrations by Deborah Kogan Ray (touching and suspenseful)

 A New Coat For Anna by Harriet Ziefert, illustrated by Anita Lobel (based on a true post-WW 2 story of delayed gratification, can be enjoyed year around)

 Silent Night by Will Moses (folk art and a new baby--what's not to love?)

 The Snow Speaks by Nancy White Carlstrom, illustrated by Jane Dyer (one of my favorite illustrators)

An Early American Christmas by Tomie dePaola  (my adult daughter, Natalie's, annual favorite, makes me want to get some real bayberry candles.)

 Christmas Remembered by Tomie dePaola  (each chapter is an interesting autobiographical story of his colorful life, pun intended)

 The Story of Holly and Ivy by Rumer Godden, pictures by Barbara Cooney  (both boys and girls like this for different reasons)

 The Christmas Miracle of Jonathan Toomey by Susan Wojciechowski, illustrated by P. J. Lynch (a very popular story)

 The Angel of Mill Street by Frances Ward Weller, illustrated by Robert J. Blake (Catholic culture pervades this survival tale)

Nine Days To Christmas, A Story of Mexico by Marie Hall Ets and Aurora LaBastida (Caldecott Medal, use this if you celebrate La Posada)

 A Time To Keep, The Tasha Tudor Book of Holidays (check out the December, then January sections)

Christmas Poetry (for tea time or bedtime?)

 A Christmas Treasury compiled by Mark Daniel (genteel)

 A Christmas Garland, Stories, poems, and prayers for the holiday season compiled by Grace Hudson, illustrated by Margaret Tarrant (sweet illustrations)

 Welcome Christmas! A Garland of Poems chosen by Anne Thaxter Eaton, decorated by Valenti Angelo (1955, sparsely illustrated)

Tales of Christmas (good weekend books):
 Why The Chimes Ring by Raymond MacDonald Alden, illustrated by Rafaello Busoni (cathedral setting)

 For Every Child A Star, A Christmas Story by Thomas Yeomans, illustrated by Tomie dePaola  (would work well for Epiphany, too)

 The Fourth Wise Man, Based on the story by Henry Van Dyke, retold by Susan Summers, illustrated by Jackie Morris (even the endpapers are gorgeous in this one)
 

 Christmas Carol by Charles Dickens, illustrated by Roberto Innocenti (the best version I have ever seen, good prep for or follow up to a live performance)

The Christmas Donkey by Gillian McClure (the only book on the list with a talking animal, I promise)

Special Feast Days During Advent:

St. Nicholas, December 6th
 The Legend of Saint Nicholas by Demi (would make a great gift today, briefly discusses Santa Claus, too)
 

 The Gift of Saint Nicholas by Dorothea Lachner, illustrated by Maja Dusikova (Eastern European village-y feel)

The Baker's Dozen by Heather Forest, illustrated by Susan Gaber (Scarlett family fave.  I told my crew that the semi-creepy old lady is a metaphor for the baker's conscience.  Others have done versions of this story, but this is my top choice.  When a business begins to cut corners or cheap-out over time, our family refers to it as a Van Amsterdam.  Read this book and you will see why.)

Immaculate Conception, December 8th
These do a good job of covering Mother Mary's early life.

 Young Mary of Nazareth by Mariana Mayer (my first choice)

 Mary by Brian Wildsmith (great artwork)

Mary, the Mother of Jesus by Tomie dePaola (if you get through this whole study, you will have done a Tomie unit.)

St. Juan Diego, December 9th/Our Lady of Guadalupe, December 12th

 The Story of Our Lady of Guadalupe, Empress of the Americas by C. Lourdes Walsh, illustrations from paintings by Jorge Sanchez-Hernandez (excellent version)

The Lady of Guadalupe by Tomie dePaola (very reverent, but easy to relate to)

 Our Lady of Guadalupe, Our Lady of the Americas by Father Lawrence Lovasik, S.V.D. (inexpensive and not very high quality publication, but good information)

St. Lucia (Lucy), December 13th

 Lucia Morning in Sweden by Ewa Rydaker, with illustrations by Carina Stahlberg (modern family's customs)

 Erik and the Christmas Horse by Hans Pererson, illustrated by Ilon Wikland (also set in Sweden, vintage 1970)

Lucia Saint of Light by Katherine Bolger Hyde Lovely book, with recipe of Santa Lucia buns and also with music for a hymn. Written from the Eastern Orthodox perspective.

 

Before you click to buy yet again

This year, the secular calendar and the liturgical calendar have lined up in such a way that we’ve been given the great gift of a good and necessary reminder. First, we had Thanksgiving. Then, it was Black Friday (which seems to have crept into Thanksgiving afternoon). Saturday was “Small (shopping) Business Saturday.” Finally came the Solemnity of Christ the King. Memo from God: “The shopping? It’s supposed to be about Christmas. And Christmas? It’s supposed to be about Jesus.” Fortunately, we have a whole week before the real beginning of Advent to get back on track... please read the rest here.

Christmas Tree Whimsy

Are you heading out to buy your tree this weekend? Going to make an adventure of it and cut your own? Want to sprinkle a little whimsical evergreen fairytale on the whole experience? 

To start, you might acquaint yourselves with the Christmas Tree Fairy and her friend the Holly Fairy. For memory work, copy and learn her song. Then, take a closer look at coniferous trees and learn the botanical information we can glean from looking carefully at Christmas trees:  Scots pine (Pinus sylvestris), Douglas fir (Pseudotsuga menziesii), Noble fir (Abies procera), and Norway spruce (Picea abies). Even if you have an artificial tree, it's fun to visit a Christmas tree farm to gather some boughs and cones in order to carefully draw and compare needles and cones.

 We've had great success teaching basic botany with books like Pine Trees and Golden Field Guides. To focus on conifers, simply read the books with your child and then work your way through together, discussing the concepts, narrating, and drawing. Don't be tempted to leave out the "drawing" step--it really does enhance understanding and retention. For further study, botanical nomenclature cards are a good way to apply the Montessori three period lesson to botany study. These cards can also be used for drawing and labeling.

Despite the fact that allergies prescribe an aritificial tree in our home and despite the definite chill in the air, we plan to get out and touch and smell and draw and photograph! After all, we have the December pages of our Outdoor Nature Workbooks to thoughtfully complete.

Art: Using the illustration in  Flower Fairies of the Winter or here, try your hand at sketching the Christmas Tree Fairy. Perhaps on another day you all can model the fairy or the Christmas Tree with modeling beeswax.  (Sources of excellent quality modeling beeswax can be found here and here.) Carefully tie gold thread on the models and hang them in the boughs of your tree!

Ideas for Evergreen Reading:

Suggested Books for Read-Alouds and Narrations (These can be narrated both verbally and artistically.  For the younger children it is often fun to keyboard an oral narration for them and then ask the child to illustrate the printed page.)

Why Christmas Trees Aren't Perfect

The Year of the Perfect Christmas Tree

Mr. Willowby's Christmas Tree

The Christmas Tree

The Legend of the Christmas Tree

 

What are you going to give up for Advent?

Did you know that sometimes Advent is referred to as "Little Lent?" Yep. It's true. In the Church, Advent isn't the grand party season. It's a season of increased prayer, fasting, and good works. All to get ready for the grand party Solemnity of Christmas. It's the fast before the feast. 

So, what are you going to give up for Advent this year? You've come to the end of the calendar year. It's late autumn and the skies are gray. Burnout is a distinct possibility and you're feeling a little fried around the edges already as you contemplate the season ahead. Perhaps, you are one of the many who struggle with depression this time of year. 

The Church, in her wisdom, provides. What to give up for Advent? How about just giving up yourself? Join us at Suscipio today to talk about sweet surrender.

Advent and Christmas Around the World

~reprint from the archives

We've promised plans for an Advent around the world, and here they are.  I post them with a hint of trepidation however.  I do not want these plans, in any way, to make any of you think that we have come up with a "new way" of doing Advent.  Advent is the season of awaiting Christ's birth, its traditions are those of a church much older and wiser than us, its theme is not rushing, but preparing, waiting for the hush to fall in the awed moments of the Nativity.  We have no doubt most of you, like us, have time-honored ways of living this season at home, some prescribed by the church and some born of your own experiences as a family.  We want you to live them this year as any other, just as we will be doing.  The books you see listed below came from our own book basket lists, they are yearly family favorites.  The celebrations, craft ideas, and recipes will probably all seem familiar.  To us, they are.  The goal as we shift gears in our homes for the season of Advent is to live the predictable rhythm of the liturgy and the comforting traditions of family life.  But we also hope to bring some special touch to each year, mark it with a unique memory all its own, so that as our kids grow, their hearts will anticipate this season with both the longing for its familiar comforts and the memories of its once-in-a-lifetime moments.  In the Foss home, there are yearly traditions and a much remembered rhythm of prayer, but then there will always be fond memories of the Jan Brett Christmas, the Tomie de Paola year, the fairy tale Christmas, and hopefully, this year, the Christmas Around the World.  I hope my little boys will also come to expect the season's familiar rhythm with joy and anticipation, and to wonder at what its unexpected surprise might be.  For isn't that the way of the Little Savior born in a stable, who fulfilled all the familiar promises in totally unexpected ways?  So we share these plans in hopes that they will encourage you to rejuvenate, not re-invent Advent, that they will enrich, not usurp, your own traditions, that they will breathe beauty and joy into the hearts of our children and yours this year.  In a year when my family needs to find the joy and beauty in what will undoubtedly be a season filled with many conflicting emotions, I am relieved to have something to be excited about.  While many of you come into this Advent with crosses much different from my own, and seemingly smaller, I pray these plans ease your burden, whatever it is, this Advent season as you wait in hope for the coming of your Savior. ~Colleen (who is celebrating in an altogether different corner of the world this year)

Beautiful Books to Learn From:

• Christmas Around the World/Lankford
• Christmas Around the World: A Pop-Up Book
• Merry Christmas, Everywhere!
• All for the Newborn Baby

We'll use these books for read-alouds and narration during this season.  I'll read a chapter or two of the Lankford book to the children at the beginning of the week, then at the end of the week, open the scene from the pop-up book and have them narrate what they see there based on what they have learned that week and note anything important the scene may be missing.

Links With a Lot to Offer: Advent and Christmas seasons at Fisheaters.com

 

Advent Week 1: Focus on Germany, Poland

Traditions to Learn About: Advent Traditions Around the World

Links for research:
German Christmas Customs
Advent Calendar
The History of the Advent Wreath
Polish Christmas Traditions
Overview and Links to Individual Feasts in Poland
 

Books to Illustrate the Idea:
Silent Night 
Waiting for Christmas
Waiting for Noel: An Advent Story

Stories for Preparing Little Hearts:
When It Snowed that Night
Who's Coming to Our House?
Country Angel Christmas
B is for Bethlehem

Fireside Tales: 
Gingerbread Friends
Gingerbread Baby
Papa's Angels
The Little Match Girl

Recipes to Try:

Lebkuchen

Pfeffernusse

Springerle

 

Ornaments for Your Tree: Sculpey Gingerbread Men, Houses

 

By Hand With Heart: Throwing Chestnuts (a fun gift for siblings, cousins, neighbors, friends)

 

 

Advent Week 2: Focus on Russia, Eastern Europe, Scandinavia

Traditions to Learn About: St. Nicholas Around the World

Links: St. Nicholas Center's Around the World Page
: Scandinavian Christmas Traditions
: Russian Christmastide

Books to Illustrate the Idea:
The Miracle of St. Nicholas
The Legend of St. Nicholas
Wonder Worker
St. Nicholas: The Real Story of the Christmas Legend
The Real St. Nicholas
The Baker's Dozen: A St. Nicholas Tale
The Miraculous Child: A Christmas Folk Tale from Old Russia 
The Wild Christmas Reindeer

Feasts to Celebrate:
St. Nicholas
Immaculate Conception
Our Lady of Guadelupe

Stories for Preparing Little Hearts:
Donkey's Dream
The Friendly Beasts
St. Francis and the Christmas Donkey 
Lady of Guadelupe

Fireside Tales:
Miracle of 34th Street
The Polar Express
Christmas Trolls
Trouble with Trolls

The Hat

The Mitten

The Twelve Days of Christmas (Brett)

The Night before Christmas (Brett and others)

Recipes to Try:

Russian Christmas Coffee Cake   

Russian Tea Cakes 

Russian Spice Tea

**All these recipes can be found on the Russian Christmastide page linked above.

Ornaments for Your Tree: Wee Wooden St. Nicholases

  

By Hand With Heart: Matroyshka Dolls (You can order blank dolls here  ....consider decoupaging them with photos of siblings or cousins or grandchildren and giving them as a family gift.)

 

Advent Week 3: Focus on Mexico, the British Isles

Traditions to Learn About: Christmas Decorations Around the World

Links for further research:  

Mexican Christmas Traditions

The Great British Christmas

Books to Illustrate the Idea:
The Legend of the Poinsettia
The Legend of the Christmas Tree
The Night of Las Posadas
Cobweb Christmas 
The Christmas Tree 
St. Francis Celebrates Christmas 
 

Feasts to Celebrate:  
St. Lucy    

Stories for Preparing Little Hearts:                         
This is the Star
O Holy Night: Harlem Boys' Choir
Room for a Little One 

Fireside Tales:

The Christmas Miracle of Jonathan Toomey

Why Christmas Trees Aren't Perfect

A Wish to be a Christmas Tree

The Year of the Perfect Christmas Tree 
An Orange For Frankie 

Recipes to Try:

Mexican Orange Spice Cookies

Mexican Hot Chocolate

Mulled Cider

British Christmas Cake

 

Ornaments for Your Tree: Poinsettia Fairies, Victorian Ball Ornament (Search the web from some inspiring images, start with styrofoam balls, then use things already in your craft cabinets to glitz them up-fabric scraps, sequins, beads, glitter, feathers--so many possibilities.  Sophisitcation and charm are your goals.)

 

By Hand With Heart: Christmas Crackers (An easy gift for neighborhood friends or homeschool groups or a nice addition to a feast day table during Advent.)

 

Advent Week 4: Focus on the Holy Land

Traditions to Learn About: The Holy Places of the Christmas Story, Nativity Scenes from Around the World

Links for research:
: One woman's memories of Christmas in the Holy Land
 
Books to Illustrate the Point:

The Legend of the Christmas Rose

The Crippled Lamb

Bright Christmas: An Angel Remembers
King of the Stable
There Was No Snow on Christmas Eve 
The Christmas Bird 
The Shepherd's Christmas Story

Feasts to Celebrate:
Christmas
St. Stephen

Stories for Preparing Little Hearts:
 Stephen's Feast 
Good King Wenceslaus 
Jane Ray: The Story of Christmas
A Christmas Story (Wildsmith)
The Very First Christmas 

Fireside Tales: 

Tomie dePaola: Jingle the Christmas Clown

The First Christmas Stocking

 A Small Miracle

Tomie dePaola: The Clown of God

Recipes to Try:

Mince Meat Pies 
Explanation: When the Crusaders came back to England, they brought with them spices from the Holy Land. These spices were added to huge pies made of meats of various kinds, minced very fine and enclosed in pastry. The pies were oblong in shape, to represent the manger. A depression was made in the top to hold a figure of the Infant Jesus, which was removed just before the pie was cut.

 

Ornaments for Your Tree: Popsicle Stick Nativity Grottos (Create small grotto shapes out of popsicle sticks, glue your favorite image of the nativity in the center and decorate with stones, jewels or sequins.), Paper Stars , Pine Cone Angels

 

By Hand With Heart: Wee Wooden Holy Families (Paint or design sets of wooden holy families for little ones' stockings.)

 

Christmas Week: Focus on Italy, France, Spain

Traditions to Learn About: Christmas Foods Around the World

Links for Research: 
: Tons of explanations, recipes, and further links to follow

Stories to Illustrate the Point:
 The Huron Carol 
The Legend of the Candy Cane
Merry Christmas, Strega Nona!
The Gift of the Christmas Cookie 

Feasts to Celebrate:
Mary, the Mother of God

Preparing Little Hearts:
Tomie dePaola: Mary: The Mother of Jesus
Mary Mother of Jesus 

Fireside Tales:

Christmas Cookies: Bite-Sized Holiday Lessons 

Recipes to Try: Your favorite cookies

Ornaments for Your Tree: beaded candy canes , salt dough cookie ornaments (Make and roll out the dough, let the kids cut them with holiday cutters, poke a small hole on the top of each with the tip of a pencil before baking.  When cooled, let the kids paint them to resemble iced and decorated cookies. Tie a ribbon through the hole and hang.)

 

By Hand With Heart: Cocoa Mix and Peppermint Marshmallows (Consider bringing these as hostess gifts when you do your holiday visiting).

 

New Year's Week: Focus on Central and South America

Traditions to Learn About: Epiphany Traditions Around the World

Links for Research:
Epiphany Traditions from World Wide Gourmet 
Twelfth Night 

Stories that Illustrate the Point:
 A Gift for the Christ Child 
Baboushka and the Three Kings 
Tomie dePaola: The Legend of Old Befana

Feasts to Celebrate:

Epiphany

Preparing Little Hearts:
We Three Kings 
 Tomie dePaola: The Story of the Three Wise Kings
 The Visit of the Wise Men 

Fireside Tales:

Max Lucado: Jacob's Gift

The Little Drummer Boy
The Last Straw 
  
Recipes to Try: Make a version of King's Cake: French, Mexican , Spanish, or New Orelans Style

 

Ornaments for Your Tree: bejeweled crowns

 

By Hand With Heart: Wee Wooden Magi (Make a sets of Wee Wooden Magi for little ones to enjoy.)

                                   

 

 

 

Books and More Books for Advent and Christmas

Thanksgiving is so early this year! That gives you an extra weekend to find Advent candles. Go! This weekend, go get those candles and when you do, buy an extra set and have them blessed on Candlemas. Then, next year, you'll already have your candles and they'll be blessed, too. You'll feel so efficient. (Unless, of course, you manage to lose them between Candlemas and the first Sunday of Advent. Ahem.)

Look for some oldies but goodies reposted here this year during Advent. We have a birthday, Christmas, a wedding, and a graduation--all in the last nine days of December. Blogging time will be a bit limited, I dare say. 

Here's a compilation of book suggestions from years past. First up is the Tomie de Paola unit--all the family activities and lessons plans a family could do for the entire month of December (and into January). This "unit" is tradition 'round these parts.

My children's ages and stages are all over the calendar in the rest of this post, so please bear in mind that this isn't real time. Some families like to wrap their Advent books and then open one a day throughout the season. In our family, we pull them all out and put them in baskets. That way, they make a lovely backdrop for monumental pictures of historic occasions. 

See? Decorating with books.

Without further ado, here's a big list to get you started. I'll be back on Friday with Chris Scarlett's list to share as well. Chris' baskets and my baskets are filled very similarly, so that list will be all spiffy and polished and up to date when it posts Friday (which, remember is still well before the first Sunday of Advent). I pretty much love the way the calendar worked this year.

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          We became devoted fans of Anne of Green Gables and the other Anne stories by L. M. Montgomery this year so it was with great joy that I reviewed Christmas With Anne And Other Holiday Stories, edited by Rea Wilmshurst. The book is a collection of short stories by Montgomery published in magazines in the early 1900’s and two stories from the Anne of Green Gables series. Like the books in the series, the stories can be a bit overly-sentimental but there is something so compelling and good about Montgomery’s characters and plots that the sweet is satisfying instead of sickening. If your children haven’t met Anne, this book, read aloud, is a lovely introduction. If they know her well, the two Christmas stories will be remembered fondly and the others will be fresh fodder for the devotion that Montgomery inspires in her young readers.

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I have been writing reviews of advent books for several years and sometimes I wonder if there will be anything fresh to read. The message of advent and Christmas can get a little worn when the book box is brimming and they all begin to look the same. I read Papa’s Angels by Collin Wilcox Paxton and Gray Carden in one sitting, with tears streaming down my face. It brought to mind a dear friend who has experienced the loss of both her parents this year and the hope and joy that I pray her children will bring her this Christmas.

Papa’s Angels is a book for older children. It is a quick and easy read but it is deep and thoughtful and at times, dark and haunting. Told through the eyes of Becca, a gifted twelve-year-old writer who lives with her father and four younger siblings in Appalachia, it is the story of the immense grief of a young father who has lost his dearly beloved wife to an illness just before Christmas. 

 As Papa retreats more and more into his sorrow, the children become increasingly hopeless that they will ever again hear him sing or see him laugh. Their grandmother keeps alive the flickers of hope that seem to be every child’s birthright and gently guides them to see how they can help their father stir from his misery. Interspersed throughout the book are lovely songs that Papa has composed in happier days to celebrate his family and express the sweet, pure, lasting love he has for his wife. In the end, it is music, the wisdom of children, and the spirit of love that triumphs over loss and brings the father back to his children.

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Jotham’s Journey by Arnold Ytreeide is an advent storybook with one installment for every day of Advent. The story is very compelling and my children frequently begged for more after one day’s devotion was read. Ten-year-old Jotham travels across Israel, searching for his family and facing great danger and breathless adventure. Ultimately, his journey takes him the Infant in Bethlehem. While the author uses this book as a bedtime story, some adventures are rather intense and I prefer to read it to my children during the day. We liked this one so well last year that I’ve ordered it for my godchildren this year. 

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Bright Christmas: An Angel Remembers comes highly recommended by my six-year-old who does not want to return it to the library. The nativity story is told from the perspective of an angel-- not really an original story line. What sets this book apart is the ability of the author to discuss the interaction of the supernatural world with the natural world and to shake off the constraints of time and embrace eternity. The supernatural and eternity are not usually within the grasp of children but this book makes them so. Readers young and old gain a greater appreciation of how the earth was made ready for the glorious night when Jesus was born. The pictures are lovely and add depth and warmth to the ethereal quality of the story.

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 I freely admit that I bought All for the Newborn Baby by Phyllis Root solely because of its title. This book lies wrapped and ready, waiting for our newborn baby. It is a well-researched, beautifully illustrated picture book that might be enjoyed by a small child on a quiet afternoon but will truly be appreciated by much older children and adults.

The author shares that she remembered being told as a child that some people are blessed on Christmas Eve with the ability to hear animals speak. She researched Christmas stories from around the world that featured miracle tales of animals and wove the stories into a lullaby that Mary might have sung to her newborn baby. The text is very simple and the illustrations exquisite. This is a book that will truly be a treasure for those who collect fine Christmas books.

 

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For the very youngest child, Who’s Coming to Our House? by Joseph Slate is engaging and endearing. The book follows a pattern so predictable that my son Christian, who was not even really a fluent talker at three, had the entire book memorized so that her could “read” it to Patrick, one. All the animals in the stable take part in preparing their house for a very special visitor.

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Three of my children were baptized during advent and we received a lovely picture book as a baptism gift. This is the Star  by Joyce Dunbar is a lovely story of the birth of Jesus that builds on itself. The book works well as a read-aloud because it is rhythmic and employs rich, poetic language and gorgeous illustrations that hold the older listener while younger listeners absorb the story. 

 

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A picture book that is suitable for older children is The Christmas Miracle of Jonathon Toomey. Toomey is a widower who has become sad and reclusive since the death of his wife and son. A seven-year-old boy and his widowed mother are persistent in offering their friendship as Jonathon carves a creche for them. The carving of the creche is a story within the story and there is a joyous miracle on Christmas day. This is a tear-jerker that gives me chills every time I read it. It is not sappy and overdone but truly touching. This is the perfect picture book for children in the middle grades who might consider themselves too old for picture books. The book was written by Susan Wojciechowski. Illustrations are rich, realistic watercolors by P.J. Lunch. If there is a seven-year-old boy in your life, you must have this book. The rest of us should find a seven-year-old boy and buy the book so that we can live the story through the eyes of the child. 

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Another excellent art book, whose text is pure scripture is a sophisticated picture book illustrated by Jane Ray called The Story of Christmas. The large pictures combine symbols from ancient and modern folk art to illustrate the Christmas story. Text is taken directly form the King James version of the gospels of Matthew and Luke. The book begs to be read aloud reverently by fathers on Christmas Eve. 

 

 

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A gift book to give a musical family is Silent Night. The text is that of the lovely carol and the illustrations, in shades of blue and soft yellow, are by popular children's illustrator Susan Jeffers. This book will help visual children to interpret the carol. The pictures are very engaging. Since the words are well-known, you might also find yourself digressing from the text to just chat your way through the book. These are pictures for conversation. Music is included so this book would make a pretty decoration propped on the piano. 

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One book in our box which is so tattered and well-loved that I would like to replace it in hardback is The Donkey's Dream by Barbara Helen Berger. It tells the story of the dreams a donkey dreamt as he carried the Blessed Mother to Bethlehem. This book is one of a few really “Catholic” feeling Christmas books. The images of Our Lady—which read like a litany—are worthy of study and discussion with older elementary and middle school children but the story can stand on its own with very young children. The pictures are beautifully colored and framed by a border of forget-me-nots, also called les yeux dex Marie.  

 

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My children’s favorite last year was The Legend of the Candy Cane by Lori Walburg. A young girl named Lucy helps a stranger in town unpack the boxes in his store. There, she discovers that his is to be candy store. The owner shares with Lucy the legend of the candy. When held upside down, the cane is a “J”, for Jesus. The red stripes represent His suffering, which washed away our sin and made us pure as the snow, represented by white stripes. I really appreciated this gentle reminder that the sweet baby was born to die for all of us--the ultimate Christmas present. The candy held upright looks like a shepherd’s staff. I pointed out to my children that the bishops and the Pope carry such staffs today. This book really begs to be a project. Lucy and the candy man went to every house in town leaving candy canes and an invitation to the store to learn the legend. I don’t think I’m up to entertaining the whole town, but perhaps a few neighborhood children would enjoy a candy cane and some cookies while we read some carefully chosen Christmas stories. 

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The Legend of the Christmas Rose by William H. Hicks is the story of Dorothy, a nine-year-old girl whose older brothers are shepherds. When they see an angel who directs them to a baby in a manger, Dorothy secretly follows them. Just before she arrives, she realizes she has no gift. Beautiful white flowers miraculously appear. When she presents them to the Christ child, He performs another miracle. The book is well-written and illustrated by lovely, realistic paintings. To extend the book, I would bring some Christmas roses into the house. 

 

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King of the Stable, by Melody Carlson, is the story of Matthew, who leaves his father’s affluent home to live with relatives in Bethlehem. Not accustomed to working, Matthew is a bit discouraged when he is made “king of the stable,” in charge of feeding, watering, and cleaning up after the animals. Since this is Bethlehem and Matthew is in charge of a stable, wondrous things are certain to happen. 

 

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Jacob’s Gift by popular Christian author Max Lucado, tells the story of a carpenter’s apprentice, Jacob, who is competing with the other apprentices to determine who will be chosen to help build the new synagogue. Jacob loves working with wood and pours his heart and soul into a beautiful feeding trough. He falls asleep just as he finishes only to be awakened by brilliant starlight and a tough decision. Jacob truly learns that “when you give a gift to one of God’s children, you give a gift to God.”  

 

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The Huron Carol is a beautifully illustrated, sophisticated picture book. Illustrator Frances Tyrell has set pictures to the English translation of an old Christmas Carol composed by Father Jean de Brebeuf, a French Jesuit missionary who lived among the Huron Indians in the early 1600’s.The carol entwines the traditional Christmas story with Huron spirit and tradition. In this book, the pictures complement the text and maintain the authenticity of the Huron heritage. 

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From my favorite publishers, the folks at Bethlehem Books, comes The Miracle of Saint Nicholas. Alexi is a Russian child whose grandmother tells him of the soldiers who closed Saint Nicholas church many years ago. When he asks why they can’t celebrate Christmas there this year, she tells him that it would take a miracle. The little boy believes in miracles. I purchased this book to give to my children on the feast of Saint Nicholas. It is my sentimental favorite because it reminds of me of people in my life who are very dear to me and who have meant much to the growing faith of our family. Two of my children’s godparents are Eastern Orthodox and, among other things, the boys are learning a true appreciation of Eastern religious art. I am especially pleased with the icons throughout the text. It is nice to see both the art and the faith of the Russians so beautifully depicted here. 

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A Christmas Story by Brian Wildsmith was well-received in our house. My children are fond of other books he has illustrated. Wildsmith’s unique illustrating style is at its best in this book. The story is a simply told rendition of the nativity story, from the perspective of Rebecca, a little girl whom Mary leaves to care for a young donkey when the donkey’s mother carries the Blessed Mother to Bethlehem. The young donkey misses his mother and Rebecca ends up in Bethlehem, too. The paintings are anything but simple. They are richly textured with brilliant color and lovely accents of gold. We stopped and looked carefully every page. This book begged to be followed by an art project, where gold paint was readily accessible. 

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My favorite book to give new mothers is When It Snowed That Night by Norma Farber. My children really don’t sit still very well for this one. I read it more for me. It is so easy in the weeks preceding Christmas to get caught up in the busy-ness of life. There is so much for parents to do. What we forget is that often what our children need most is not that we do but that we be. They need us to be available to them to talk or rock or read or just sit in comfortable silence when the story is finished. This book remains in our Christmas box to remind me to slow down and just be with my children. Reading aloud is a wonderful vehicle for doing that. 

The book is composed of poems from many of the creatures who went to greet the Christ child. At the end of the book, the queens come. They are late, having left their children with sitters, and they don’t stay long because: 

 

“Their thoughts are already straining far— 

Past manger and mother and guiding star and child aglow as a morning sun— 

toward home and children and chores undone.” 

 

They are distracted because they are going in too many directions. There are so many worthy causes—particularly during advent and Christmastime. 

I don’t want to be like the queens, giving little bits of myself to lots of people and all of my heart and soul to no one. Instead, I want to serve my Lord with my whole heart—caring tenderly for the children he has entrusted to me and guarding carefully my time so that I don’t over-commit and neglect my home and family. 

We are given opportunities every day to bring into our children’s lives those things which are true and beautiful when we read aloud to them in our homes. We have the opportunity to be like the last creature in Farber’s book, who identifies with and emulates the Blessed mother: 

 

           I never got to Bethlehem, 

someone, I thought, should (day and night) 

be here, someone should stay at home. 

I think I was probably right. 

 

For I have sung my child to dream

far, far away from where there lies 

a woman doing much the same. 

And neither of our children cries. 

 

Beautiful books are enduring and I can imagine sharing our collection, which will be quite large, at Christmas with my children’s children. I also give books to each of my godchildren each year at the beginning of advent. I hope these books will find a special place in the hearts of the children who are dear to me. I know they have found a place in mine.

from 2005:
Knowing that Katie, our youngest, was unlikely to stay with the task for the duration, we began with B is for Bethlehem. Isabel Wilner tells the story of Christmas in lyrical couplets, which are neither sticky nor snooty. The exuberant collage art in this nicely sized board book makes it eye candy for all of us, young or old.
Katie still with us, we moved on to There Was No Snow on Christmas Eve. The prose on each page is sparse, so the book moves quickly enough for little ones, but watercolor illustrations captivate readers and beg us to linger. There is reality here: Mary is very young, the earth is dry and dusty, and the animals don’t speak. But there is beauty and believability in the reality of the miracle.
     Linda Schlafer’s A Gift for the Christ Child: A Christmas Folktale is a lovely story of two South American boys who travel from their poor home in the mountains to the glorious church in town to make a Christmas offering on behalf of their family. Along the way, they are called to minister to a woman in need. This book is also illustrated with bright collages, but they are simple collages. And it’s the simplicity of the illustrations that really captivates and truly expresses the message of the story.
     In The Year of the Perfect Christmas Tree:  An Appalachian Story by Gloria Houston, it’s Ruthie and her mother who must fulfill the family’s Christmas obligation. They are supposed to furnish the perfect Christmas tree for the town’s celebration. Ruthie’s father had chosen the tree before he left to fight in the war. But he has not yet returned home when it is time to harvest the tree for Christmas. This is a touching story of great wealth amidst poverty. Barbara Clooney’s illustrations are wondrous and this lovely tear-jerker is destined to become a family favorite in our house.
     We seem to be collecting quite a treasure trove of Saint Nicholas books, so I’m not sure how The Legend of Saint Nicholas by Demi escaped us until now. A very complete account of the beloved Patron of Children, this book’s gilded pictures are memorable and tease the reader with almost icon-like presentations of modern Christmas symbols. For instance, young Nicholas tosses gold coins into a fur-trimmed red Christmas stocking. There is so much to talk about on every page of this book and so many opportunities for every member of the family to grow closer good St. Nick!   
     My friend Kathy discovered O Holy Night: Christmas with the Boys Choir of Harlem at the Catholic Shop and called especially to tell me about it. The first thing that struck me about this book, illustrated by the renowned Faith Ringgold, is that the Holy Family is dark-skinned and the supporting cast is multi-ethnic. The book begins with scripture and then moves to illustrated lyrics of traditional carols. An accompanying CD is a soulful recording of the Harlem Boys Choir singing Christmas carols. Truly, this book and CD set is a sensory feast.
     My favorite book this year is a simple one compared to the others. The illustrations are drawn in colored pencil and reflect the message: Christ is not complicated. He is not hard to find. He is simple. He came to the shepherds—poor, uneducated, humble servants. He made himself obvious and available to the lowly. The Shepherd’s Christmas Story by Dandi Daley Mackall evokes the whispers of Old Testament prophecies and underscores the tenderness of the Good Shepherd. Children will like the storyline which is rich with the images of a shepherd’s life, but the message is not a childish one. Children believe in God; they accept Him readily as truth. It is adults who search for God—they seek him, often without knowing what they are seeking. They look for knowledge and nobility, for theological understanding, for outward signs of secular greatness, both for themselves and for their Savior. But they will find Him in infinite simplicity. He is Love. He is the baby, the Good Shepherd, the Lamb of Sacrifice, and the risen Lord who commanded Peter to feed his sheep. He made himself known to the uneducated, unsophisticated, simple shepherd who walked solely by faith. This Advent, as we share stories with our children, we pray for an increase in faith, so that though we may not understand at all, we—like the shepherds—will truly know Love.

 

Let's Hang Out and Plan for Advent {and a Giveaway!}

Every year, do you get to about December 9th and promise yourself that next year you'll start in early November and plan well for Advent so that you are totally prepared with a plan and supplies (and advent candles) on the first Sunday of Advent? Yeah, me too!

This year, my friends, we're going to do it! Please join me at St. Veronica in Chantilly to be inspired to seize this Advent for all it has to offer. A one-of-a-kind workshop, this conference has been lovingly put together by some very gifted ladies. And they are so pleased to be able to offer it. Colleen Rooney tells me, "Living Advent is a work of love for me, and I dare say for all the Living Advent Team and helpers. It is going to be a grace-filled day. I do not doubt it for one second. God has opened many doors.  Evelyn Birge Vitz, author of A Continual Feast, is a wonderful, Catholic woman of many talents, which she shares with a great many people. Her talk will delight, inspire, and encourage her audience. She will lift us up with wisdom.  Her three daughters and her daughter-in-law will join her towards the end of her talk to share how they prepare for Christmas through Advent with some of the traditions she introduced as they were growing up in the Vitz family. "

The workshops are numerous. Some very gifted women will speak to their strengths. There are talks planned on cooking and baking and crafting, on sacred art and music for the season, on family prayer and on ways to live mercy as we prepare for Christmas. My friend Laraine Bennett, author of numerous {excellent} books, will tie it all together for us at the end and help us make a clear plan for both the Martha and the Mary in Advent. 

I plan to present a workshop on how to use the web to live a fully engaged contemplative and active Advent. We'll discuss the plethora of apps that can help you organize prayer time and actually inspire you to pray all day. I wrote my talk a couple of months ago and honestly, I misunderstood. I thought it was to be all about prayer. Will you pray for me as I amend it today and tomorrow and get it ready for November 3rd? We'll begin with prayer and then, we'll talk about all the ways we can find great Advent recipes, activities, books, and family traditions on the internet and bring them into our homes. Hmmm, wonder where I'll start;-)?

The conference is at St. Veronica in Chantilly on November 3, 2012. An optional lunch is available and you are invited to Adoration all through the day. This day promises to be an amazing gift, both for the women who attend and for the families they will bless.

I'm looking forward to seeing local readers there, so much so that I'd like to offer you a chance at a free registration. Please leave a link to your favorite online Advent resource or idea below, and you'll be entered to win a registration to this fabulous conference for free. I'll announce the winner on Tuesday, so she can make plans, but don't wait until then to register--it's filling fast. If you win, and you're already registered, bring a friend!

 

When Feeding them is Art and Food is the Medium

One of our long-held traditions is to make antipasto during the Christmas season. I rarely (if ever) make it any other time of the year, but I usually make it twice or more during Christmas. This year, I made one for lunch on Christmas day and another, the next day, as an appetizer. All my ingredients came from Costco and Trader Joe's. There are as many ways to make this as there are cooks in kitchens on any given day. And it never comes out the same here. When I shop, I always get the following:

Provolone cheese

Salami

Prosciuttio

Kalamata olives

marinated artichoke hearts

marinated roasted peppers

tapenade or a roasted eggplant spread

I also buy marinated button mushrooms. And I'm sure I put them in my cart this time. However, my shopping companion does not like mushrooms and they mysteriously were absent when I unloaded at home. Ahem.

You can add all sorts of things: any marinated vegetable salad, balls of fresh mozarella, green olives, marinated sun dried tomatoes. It's fun to look for little treasures in your store. Well, usually it's fun. When we lived in the deep south it was kind of frustrating. There was not really an abundance of Italian delis in South Carolina.

Every year, one or more of my children begs to make the antipasto. And I never let them. It's my secret anti-anxiety therapy. If I'm stressed about a party or a certain guest, I head to the kitchen and cook something that requires some creative thought. Calms me every time. This particular party food? The ultimate creative fun in the kitchen. Just play with the food; there's no right or wrong.

I start with a layer of cheese on an oval platter. I'm not sure why it's an oval platter, but I think it might be the only rule. As I build, the marinades from the vegetables will season the cheese, too. 

 

Then salami folded into little flowers. It's nice to build some dimension.

If you pinch the little flowers at the point, the fat in the salami holds the flower in its shape. I didn't say I eat it. I just like making it. 

This roll was new at Costco this year and it fit right in. Often, I buy little balls of fresh mozarella and marinate them. But this is prosciuttio and basil wrapped around fresh mozarella. I sliced it. It was a big hit so I hope we see it in Costco next year, too. Maybe, maybe not. We'll just go with the flow. Remember: there's no wrong way to do this.

Lots of meat and cheese at this point. Easily, this is a lunch or a hearty football food.

The meats I bought at Costco this year had salami and capocollo and sopressata in the same package, so I rolled some meat as well as making flowers.

Then, I added color-- marinated yellow and red peppers sliced into thin strips. After this is all made, I never eat the meat and cheese, but I'm all about the vegetables. We have cousins who won't touch the veggies but make a full meal of the meat and cheese. There's something for everyone and there is rarely anything left over at the end of the day.

I love the peppers. I use an entire jar for each antipasto and usually wish I had more.

Tuck an olive inside each of those flowers and scatter some more around the perimeter. There are never leftover olives.

Tapenade in the center. Mary Beth loves green olive tapenade. I'm fairly certain it's hers alone.

Marinated artichoke hearts wherever I can put them. My sister and I used to fight over who got to eat those.

See? Art.

And it's never the same twice.

 

Here is the one I did the next day. I think this might be my favorite one ever.

Until next year.