Renovation Daybook

Outside My Window::

::It is cold and clear.

I am Listening to::

::banging, pounding,scraping, sawing-- and it all sounds like it's coming right though the ceiling.In the background is the sound of Christian's guitar. He blesses us with a melody for these chaotic days.

I am wearing ::

::a pretty cute pink sweatshirt and yoga pants
 

I am Thankful For::

::118   78-pound boxes of hardwood flooring

I am Pondering:

::What if I allow myself to put the outcome in God’s hands and just live intensely in the present, absorbing and embracing life as it happens?

Emilie Lemmons
(thanks to Jen for reminding me)

I am Reading:

::Hind's Feet on High Places

From the Kitchen::

::I cooked and cooked last week. We had some great homecooked dinners, especially. That's good because I see a lot of fast food in our immediate future.

I am Thinking:

::that real life has been very busy lately and if you sent me an email I probably owe you an apology. Unfortunately, it's the messages that beg a thoughtful reply that get put off more often than I'd like.

I am Creating::

::memories. There are ten of us huddled in the basement today while the old flooring is pulled up and carried away. It's crowded, particularly since we've stashed everything from the upstairs closets and bookshelves down here. It's cold because the heat is off since the door is open as they drag things in and out above us. And, frankly, we're all getting on each other's nerves just a wee bit. But I am determined to make the memories of this time be good ones.

On my iPod::

::Lots to share here, but I think it will have to be a post later in the week.

Towards a Real Education::

::We're doing the best we can to do all things academic despite the disruption in our environment. But, in all honesty, I see a little math, a little grammar, a little writing and a lot of Wii and movies in the plans for this week.

Towards Rhythm and Beauty:

::the steady rhythm of the hammers and saws are bringing me ever closer to beauty in my home. All good.

To Live the Liturgy:

::Ordinary Time. This is not ho-hum time. Instead, Ordinary Time in the Church is the time that she has ordered for us. It is set aside for an orderly progression through the gospels. Ordered Time. Indeed. I feel myself enveloped by the maternal concern of Mother Church as she gently buts firmly guides me towards order--in my environment, yes, but more importantly, in my soul.

I am Hoping and Praying:

:: for grace and patience.

In the Garden:

::there's a good deal of huffing and puffing, storming and blowing.

Around the House:

::I have relinquished all control to a very competent carpenter and his crew. God bless him!

On Keeping Home:

::So, now I'm stuck in the basement for the week. Guess what we're cleaning and organizing?

One of My Favorite Things:

::fresh flowers in the pretty vase that Kimberlee gave me for my birthday a few years ago. Mike brought me pink carnations for it yesterday. 

Sarah Annie this week:

::She said "Pat Pat" as she called for Patrick. I'm not sure which was cuter: her delight at making the words come out just right or his uncontrollable grin as he realized that's what she said and who she wanted. It was one of those moments that make having big kids and little kids all at the same time a very beautiful thing.

::She can also say "bellybutton" and is quite fascinated with them. That's especially funny when I consider that this time last year, her bellybutton was something of a conversation piece. Patrick likes to show her his because he's always up for an opportunity to show off his abs;-)

A Few Plans for the Rest of the Week:

::lots and lots of renovation above us and lots and lots of opportunities to grow in virtue.

A Picture Thought I'm Sharing:

What She Said

The Suitcase.

Spanking

The search widget on my lefthand sidebar lists the search terms in order of frequency. I cannot tell you how annoying it is to me that SPANKING is being shouted from the lefthand side of my blog.  To you who are searching (relentlessly it seems): there's not much here. I have spanked one child, one time, while under the *very temporary* influence of the Ezzos and I still rue the day. My third baby was five weeks old and I was seriously sleep deprived and desperate to figure out mothering once and for all so I could get some sleep. The Ezzos told me it was all Le Leche League's fault and a good swift spank to my recalcitrant toddler would ensure much needed peace to all (well, they didn't say it in so many words, but that was what I took from my speed reading of ALL of their books in one weekend). So I did. And not one single problem was solved. As a matter of fact, that child still reminds me to this day that he is the only one who was ever spanked in our household. He says he's scarred for life;-).

Anyway, if you're searching for "how the Foss family does the discipline thing" and you typed in "spanking" as a shortcut, you might find what you're looking for here  or here and definitely here.And I would so appreciate it if some of you would take a moment and search for something other than "spanking" or its runner-up "depression" and bump them off the really big font honors. Something cheerful and pretty? That looks good on the sidebar? Please? Because we're all about looking pretty:-)

Thank you.

January Daybook

Outside My Window::

::It is bitter cold. The wind is blowing 30 miles an hour and the wind chill is 4 degrees F.

I am Listening to::

::Katie practicing the piano.

I am wearing ::

::Under Armor sweatpants and a Middle Tennessee sweatshirt. Do the cashmere socks redeem it all? Maybe?
 

I am Thankful For::

::a good night's sleep. Or two. Maybe even three. Makes a huge difference.

::the real grace of the sacraments.

I am Pondering:

::You learn to speak by speaking, to study by studying, to run by running, to work by working; in just the same way, you learn to love by loving.

- St. Francis de Sales

I am Reading:

::Pioneer Woman's love story. It's riveting. Really. I read a couple of Pioneer Woman's posts a few years ago and never went back. It bugged me that she called her children "punk rugrats" and I figured we didn't have a whole lot in common. But I'm utterly charmed by High Heels to Tractor Wheels. Darling. And now I sort of see how "punk rugrats" fits her whole schtick. Sort of.

From the Kitchen::

::I watched Julie and Julia this week. The next morning, my friend Jan called me. Jan and I learned how to make some very good meals in an ancient electric kitchen in an apartment in Charlottesville, once upon a time. My Italian heritage met her Alabama roots and we emerged from that little kitchen with something that sounded like Carraba's, if nothing else:-). Anyway, she was in a kitchen mood and I was in a bloggy mood and we wondered aloud just what cookbook we would cook through if we were to undertake a similar  mission. We agreed that Julia Child's masterpiece wouldn't work in our current state of life. Ina Garten? The Monastery Kitchen? Giada? Hmmm...what about The Pioneer Woman? Stay tuned. It's just an idea right now.

I am Thinking:

::that twenty years ago, I was diagnosed with cancer. Somewhere in the middle of treatment, I swore I'd never complain about bad hair days or birthdays again. My birthday is next week and my hair is graying as if on cue. But I'm not complaining.

I am Creating::

::order. Yes! I'm creating lots and lots of empty spaces, at least temporarily, as I prep to have hardwood floors installed throughout the house. It's like moving--everything is being moved to the basement. Moving is very good for thoroughly purging and cleaning. We were long overdue for that.

On my iPod::

::Oh. my. goodness! I am in iPod heaven. I have an iTouch. I have iBreviary (seriously changing my life already). I have Lose It (making no difference whatsoever, but hope springs eternal). I have iCal. I have the Weather Channel. I have ESPN scores. I have decided to leave comments open on this post should you have apps to recommend. And many thanks to Lissa for getting this ball rolling in our household.

Towards a Real Education::

::Ahh! Back to the books! Mike and I had a long heart-to-heart (or two or three) and tweaked the routines around here. I'm ready to get back to work.

::Well continue our geography studies, relying heavily upon Ann's volume exploring the Holy Land.

::Our writing workshop is shifting into high gear (just for the teens) and we're going full steam ahead with Shakespeare studies.

::It's M week on the Alphabet Path and we'll linger here a couple of weeks. There is richness in these plans that I don't want to rush. I've taken those four baskets from Advent and left them where they were on the window seat in the family room. Now, they are filled with Mother Goose, Robert McCloskey, St. Martin, Miracles and the Mass, and Manners and Mirette and Mailing May.

Towards Rhythm and Beauty:

::Let's talk beauty: Danielle was spot-on when she recommended Revlon Colorstay Lipcolor:. The color really does last forever.There's Colorstay concealer, too. Top notch. 

I'm finding that our homemade healing salve is working much better than any nightcream I've ever tried. It was Mary Beth's idea.

I'm still a big fan of Aveda's cream blush. A bit pricey, but it's hard to find cream blush and powder makes me feel like I'm suffocating. And now, I'm in trouble. I went to link to it and discovered that it's no longer there!

Those are all the the tips I have today:-)

To Live the Liturgy:

::an early birthday present, the iPod Touch has brought iBreviary into my life for the new year. This has really helped me to pray the Liturgy of the Hours and bring the rhythm of prayer back into my life. It's only been a couple of weeks, but the difference is palpable.

I am Hoping and Praying:

:: for health and fitness, strength and grace to do His will.

In the Garden:

::there's a good deal of huffing and puffing, storming and blowing.

Around the House:

::The Christmas decorations are mostly boxed and put away, save for a couple of nativity sets high on the mantel. This is highly unusual for us. But the wood has been ordered and it's on its way. Won't be long now before major renovation begins..

On Keeping Home:

::Oh, I'm looking forward to cooking and cleaning in a just regular way this week.

One of My Favorite Things:

::Christmas Eve Tea by Stash. Too bad I discovered it January 2nd. 

Sarah Annie this week:

::She's finally warming up to Michael a bit. He's been quite hurt at her standoffishness.

A Few Plans for the Rest of the Week:

::ballet, soccer, and basketball resume. I did relish the break while it lasted.

::Michael is still home, so that's nice.

A Picture Thought  I'm Sharing:

A very tired me, looking in absolute shock at a very clever husband who managed to pull off quite the astonishing and incredibly thoughtful surprise.

(It's a MacBook, Mom. Computer. Of my very own.Better than jewelry; trust me.)

Now

Yesterday, I was astonished to find hundreds of new blog posts on my Google Reader. The multitude caught me by surprise because I have had absolutely no time to open this computer in the last week or so, never mind actually write anything:-)! I read several posts late yesterday afternoon, though, as my family waged a fierce FIFA tournament on the XBOX. A little escapism, perhaps...

I noticed that this year, as in years past, women are thoughtfully choosing words to guide the new year. And I summarily dismissed the idea. I can't box my hopes and aspirations for this year into one word and I didn't even give it a second of conscious thought. I clicked the laptop shut, went upstairs, tucked myself and my baby into bed and settled under several layers of covers to watch Tim Tebow play his final game. My boys don't like Tim Tebow. They think he's too perfect; it gets under their skin. I think they're jealous;-). Anyway, they were all about virtual soccer; Mary Beth was reading Christmas books to the little girls; and Sarah and I had Tim and the Gators all to ourselves.

I promptly fell asleep.

I awakened at 12:55. Game over. The post-game press conference coming from my television revealed a bright, articulate, very happy Tebow. They won. I missed the whole thing. I heard Mike shutting down the house and then coming up the stairs. Some XBOX tournament!

"I missed the game," I whined.

"They won," his eyes twinkled at the thought that I'd managed to sleep through the whole game.

"I gathered that," I muttered, looking at the television screen. I wasn't even going to give him the satisfaction of asking for any game details. Instead, I got up to take my contacts out and return to bed for real this time.

He was captivated by the baby sleeping there. "She's beautiful," he sighed. "Let's wake her up. She'll smile, then we can see her dimples."

Uh, no. Let's not.

Instead, I snuggled in next to her and inhaled her sweetness.

"I can't imagine life without a baby."

"Me neither. They just keep getting sweeter."

So does he.

My eyes filled with tears unbidden and I was grateful for the dark as he turned out the light. Life marches along; every new year brings changes to a family. People grow taller; some even grow beards. Babies become toddlers (or in the case of ours, a bigger baby who charms everyone she knows into carrying her wherever she wants). Hair grows grayer. And it's not just his hair this year, but mine as well.

Time.

I want to stop time. I don't want to think about the failures of yesterday. I don't want to think about the uncertainty of the future. I just want today--with all nine children under my roof and a comfortable spot in this warm bed between sweet husband and beautiful baby. Sleeps comes again. I am so tired I cannot even finish a thought these days.

Sometime in the night, the baby nurses and I am half awake. That's when my word for the year finds me. I certainly didn't find the word. I wasn't even looking. The word is "Now."

Now.

Now is just fine. Now is good.

In my sleepiness, I am assured:

Don't borrow trouble from yesterday or anticipate the sorrows of tomorrow. He gives you grace sufficient for today. For now. Live in now.

And only now.

One moment at a time.

Assured that He will be present in the moment.