Kind Conversation~ Mission Statement

Join the discussion HERE!

It is my wholehearted conviction that the successof this network rests entirely upon every one of its members remembering the mission: We exist solely to encourage one another in seamless lives of holiness.


As we move fingers across a keyboard, we must ask ourselves: do they bless?


Sometimes, others will be blessed when we ask a question. It is a great gift to be able to articulate the ponderings of another’s heart. Sometimes, others will be blessed when we provide an answer. Always, we can bless with the witness of our lives—and our words.


 


Our Creator has generously given us the gift of time and the gift of work. Our work is in our homes. Everything we do must be ordered towards nurturing those He has entrusted to our care. It is my sincere hope that this venue will be an aid in using your time with your family well, that you will find things here to help lighten your load, lift your spirits, and make your heart sing. Don’t waste time here. Do God’s work here. If what you’re reading or writing isn’t bringing you closer to God-- making you a better wife and mother-- then push away from the computer. 


 


The journey towards this space took place during all of Lent. For me, it was a most unexpected journey. As I sit here today, on the eve of Easter, I look to the words that have guided me through this Lent and guided us as we created this place for you. Those words, taken together, provide the guidelines for this unique place of Kind Conversation.


 


Do not sow a crop of good intentions in your neighbor's garden, but cultivate your own with diligence.


~St. Francis de Sales


 


If you click on the tab labeled “My Garden,” you will find your own space here. You can go to the righthand sidebar and click on the “manage” button and set about decorating your spaceJ . This is your garden; I look
forward to visiting!


 


"Talkativeness is the throne of vainglory, on which it loves to show itself and make a display. Talkativeness is a sign of ignorance, a door to slander, a guide to jesting, a< servant of falsehood, the ruin of godly conviction, a creator and summoner of hopelessness, a precursor of sleep, the dissipation of recollection, the
abolition of watchfulness, the cooling of zeal, the darkening of prayer."


~St. John Climacus


 


There is a difference between talkativeness and community. Kind Conversation is about community, not talkativeness. Stop and ask yourself if you are building community or wasting time.


 


After seeing how many people waste their lives (without a break: gab, gab, gab---and with all the consequences!) I can better appreciate how necessary and lovable silence is. And I can understand, Lord, why you will make us account for every idle word. ~St. Josemarie Escriva


 


Wasting time is sinful. Let this place be a place of blessing, not the near occasion of sin.


 


This is what that really is: grumbling, gossiping, tale-bearing, scandal-mongering, back-biting. Or even slander? Or viciousness?


When those who are not supposed to sit in judgment do so, they very easily end up as gossiping old maids.


~St. Josemarie Escriva


 


 


Don’t sit in judgment. Be very, very careful never to venture into calumny or detraction. In matters of prudential discernment, take what you read into your own heart, share it with your husband and seek qualified spiritual direction, but do not judge someone else’s heart or soul.
We want to guard carefully against becoming bitter, gossiping old maids. If you see a conversation that has become unkind, please don’t hesitate to use the“Report” button at the bottom of every page. And I promise you I won’t hesitate to take whatever means necessary to squelch behavior that even hints of the waste of life about which St. Josemarie Escriva writes.


 


This is not a debate forum and it’s not an apologetics forum. There are other places on the web for that. Over time, I’ve learned that heated internet discussions rarely change anyone’s minds. Instead, they create laundry piles, whiny children, and disgruntled, neglected husbands. Childhood is too short; marriage too precious. Please limit yourself to kind conversation.


 


St. Ephrem’s Lenten prayer sums up well the atmosphere we desire for the venue:


 


O Lord and Master of my life! Take from me the spirit of sloth, faint-heartedness, lust of power, and idle talk.  But give rather the spirit of  chastity, humility, patience,
and love to Thy servant. Yea, O Lord and King! Grant me to see my own errors
and not to judge my brother; For Thou art blessed unto ages of ages. Amen


 


I pray that this place does not become for me the occasion of sloth or faintheartedness or lust of power or idle talk. I pray that it will be only and always a blessing. Will you pray that prayer with me?


 


Finally, as we look with great anticipation to the Feast of Divine Mercy, I take to heart the words of St. Faustina:


 


Great are the faults committed by the tongue. The soul will not attain sanctity if it does not keep watch over its tongue.


 


I beg you to keep careful watch over what you say.

Welcome to this special place! Come walk with us as we seek to encourage and be encouraged. Come talk with us as we cultivate together a habit of Kind Conversation.


 

It won't be long now!

Danielle has all the news about where find the news as we get VERY close to shipping Small Steps for Catholic Moms: Think. Pray. Act. Every Day. If you pre-order, you'll be the first to get yours! What a nice way to start the Easter season--a new devotional inspiration.

***

In other news, things are crazy busy here. My husband called yesterday and asked what was up with my blog. Since I've been messing with URLs and such, this query made me nervous.

"Why, what do you see?"

"Your last post is March 24th. I can't see any after that."

"Right. That's the last one."

"Oh. Why?"

Dear man, the next thing I post will be all the homemaking lists I've made just so I don't go absolutely nuts trying to keep all these balls in the air while you are away during a major liturgical season.

Speaking of balls and being away, my husband has had some fun in Dallas meeting my blog friends, who showed up with lots of little kids to watch Paddy play. That's so awesome, because Paddy is used to playing for an audience of small fans. I'm sure everyone is a lot less homesick thanks to great big Texas hospitality. But I admit to being more than a little envious...Wish I were there doesn't really cut it.

Mike has my camera. Perhaps there will be pictures soon...or maybe they will  up on a Texas blog.

Freedom...from anger

I broke my news fast on Sunday. I'd gone all of Lent without TV or radio news, glancing through the newspaper and reading newsy blogs only infrequently. About noon on Sunday, I wrestled with myself. It was Sunday, after all, and so it was okay to do something I'd given up for Lent. And it was destined to be an "historic" news day. But (don't you love how when you wrestle with yourself you can start sentences with conjunctions?), I really was finding a greater sense of peace in both my soul and my environment without cable news. All in all, the carefully chosen media outlets I'd chosen for my fast were exactly what I needed to avoid. But, on Sunday, I caved. For just  few minutes. And then I walked around angry the rest of the day and, truth be told, into the next day.

On Tuesday, there was more news to fuel anger, this coming quietly in my inbox and not trumpeted by Bret Baier. Still, anger provoked and no where to vent.

And then someone sent me this. A three step program for anger management:

The beginning of freedom from anger is silence of the lips when the heart is agitated; the middle is silence of the thoughts when there is a mere disturbance of soul; and the end is the imperturbable calm under the breath of unclean winds." ~St. John Climacus

Whoa. I read that slowly a few thousand times.

I had already pre-programmed yesterday's quote before my anger management issues arose. Turned out to be good advice. Today's planned quote was all set to be another from St. Francis de Sales:

Complain as little as possible about the wrongs you suffer. Undoubtedly, a person who complains commits a sin by doing so, since self-love always feels that injuries are worse than they really are. Above all, do not complain to irascible or fault-finding persons. If you feel the need to correct an offense or restore your peace of mind by complaining to someone, do so to those who are even-tempered and really love God. Instead of calming your mind, the others will create worse difficulties, and rather than pulling out the thorn that is hurting you, they will drive it deeper into your foot. --St Francis de Sales

The end of Lent is always hard. Satan knows our weaknesses and he throws everything at his last-ditch efforts to make us sin. He doesn't really care how he gets us to sin, he just wants us to turn our back on God. Women tend to sin by talking.

After seeing how many people waste their lives (without a break: gab, gab, gab---and with all the consequences!) I can better appreciate how necessary and lovable silence is. And I  can understand, Lord, why you will make us account for every idle word.

and

This is what that really is: grumbling, gossiping, tale-bearing, scandal-mongering, back-biting. Or even slander? Or viciousness?

When those who are not supposed to sit in judgment do so, they very easily end up as gossiping old maids.

~St. Josemarie Escriva


Anger rarely makes us better wives or mothers. Bitterness sharpens our tongues and hardens our hearts. We are called to bear wrongs patiently, called to turn away wrath. We are called to be even-tempered and really love God. We are created to live in community, too. It's not so much that our talking is bad. We have to talk, even those of us who wish we didn't. It's what we're saying; it's the idle words, the empty words, the words that tear down and destroy. Whether we're angry about national news or news in our own circles, it's in times like these that we need to encourage one another and build each other up, to let our speech be ever more gentle. We need to remind each other that our words can give someone else just that little extra nudge they need to live well for Christ. Or our words can devastate. And what we say to someone else will indeed settle deep into our own souls. So, if we're going to make someone angry these last few days of Lent, let's anger the devil: let's love one another--genuinely, truly and without condition--beginning with the people in our own homes.

God promises us all the grace we need to live in His spirit. We can defeat the devil. We can overcome anger and hurt and injustice and return an insult with a blessing. We simply need to avail ourselves to that grace.

I'm off to make a tea party for little girls (and boys who are ever-so-glad to have a certain strawberry blond back in their midst).

Have a beautiful, blessed, grace-filled day!

We tried to simplify;-)

In an attempt to simplify things, we put navigation bars here and at Serendipity. Now, when you key in elizabethfoss.com, you'll be redirected to this blog. And then, once you're here, if you want to get to Serendipity, you click on "Learning Ideas at Serendipity" on the tab at the top of the page.When you get to Serendipity, there are tabs across the navigation bar at the top to help you find pretty much everything there (we still have some things left to link).

Simple, right? Well, yeah, except that www.elizabethfoss.com won't work until tomorrow. If you leave off the www, it works. Michael's working on it. If, by this time tomorrow, you still can't get there, please do email me. I had no idea there was a problem until some of you wrote. So thanks!

And there are two new posts up at Serendipity if you want to try out the navigation button:-)