Never too many children or too many flowers!

Livesoflovelinesslogo200612_2In almost every garden, the land is made better and so is the gardener. --Robert Rodale

Until last spring, I was a dash and splash gardener. I'd dash off to the garden store every spring and buy some annuals and some vegetables and ensure a splash of color and flavor for the season. What influenced this approach, I think, was the gardening of my childhood. We moved from place to place because my father was in the Navy. As soon as the boxes were unpacked, my mother would hang pictures and curtains and whatever else she could to make it feel like home. But it was only temporary. No wallpaper or remodeling--nothing with roots. We wouldn't be there long. So I learned to love begonias and tomatoes, plants that gave us pleasure for a short while and didn't trouble me when we moved on.

There were some stately oaks dripping with Spanish moss in our backyard in Charleston, SC. I did love those trees. But I didn't plant them and I wasn't overly attached to them. From there, we moved to Northern Virginia. And someone planted peonies. I don't know if it was my mother or my father or the people who lived in the house before us. I just know that they came back year after year after year. I know they bloomed for my senior prom. I know they were perennials. Perennials. They had roots; they counted on someone to care for them from season to season, year after year. And they bloomed predictably. I lived in that house longer than any other in my childhood. And I learned I liked things that grew.

Then, I got married and moved into a house with a little bit of land of its own. I didn't know a thing about planting a garden. All I really knew was that in the spring, I was supposed to go and buy some color for the front beds. I planted impatiens. I remember the first season I planted them--I was impatient! I squatted in the garden nine and a half months and hoped the very act of planting would put me into labor. Did you know that impatiens grow seed pods in the fall that pop when small boys squeeze them? And that means that in the spring, "volunteer" impatiens bloom? Not really perennials, but still, color from the year before--a sense of continuity.

Years and years went by. Years of not knowing how long we'd be in a house. Years of having babies and babies and babies  and not having a whole lot of time for planning and planting and tending a garden...Until last year.

Last year, we dug in. We had truckloads of dirt delivered to our house and our boys shoveled and hauled and spread. We all studied gardening together. And then I bought perennial flowers and herbs. These were a whole new world of plants to me. These were plants that would flower and grow and then I would tend them in the fall and they would come again--bigger, better, stronger, more--the following year. Dsc03052 These were plants in which to invest time and energy and love. These were plants that begged my patience.They were little tiny things when I planted them last year. They whispered, "Trust me. Take good care of me. Wait for me. Watch me grow."

I could do that. I was well practiced at that. I have children. Like  a little row of flowers, they are growing. Some are a bit on the wild side and their beauty catches one off guard.Tulips0010 Some are more contained and utterly lovely at first glance, only to be lovelier the longer you look. Some require careful, almost constant pruning. Others are decidedly low maintenance. Together, they are breathtaking!

The thing about gardening, I've discovered, is that there's always room for one more plant. A little shifting, a little pruning and the whole garden looks better for the addition. The plants challenge me and teach me things. Sometimes, they require that I step out in faith. Garden0001 I planted peonies last year, even though the nursery lady told me that they wouldn't bloom until this year. That's okay, I'm used to waiting nine months at a time for a bloom. Now, I'm watching those tightly closed buds eagerly and wondering if they'll bloom in time for Michael's senior prom. (He couldn't care less, but I think it'd be kind of cool.)

This year, I planted rosebushes. They are John Paul II roses and Our Lady of Guadalupe roses--very fitting, I think, for the first summer of Karoline Rose. People have warned me that roses are difficult to grow. I'm too inexperienced. It's too hard. I bought too many. I smile at that. Garden0002_2 I've heard it before. ..and I know that there are never too many and that, like the children, the roses will teach me; they'll show me; I'll learn what I'll need to learn. Together, we'll grow.

Visit As Cozy as Spring for the Loveliness of Gardens Fair!

Father B

I knew as soon as Iread the email that I’d have to ask the questions. And so, as soon as my older boys awakened, I took a deep breath and asked them what every Catholic parent hopes she’ll never have to ask:

 

“Did Fr. B. ever act inappropriately towards you in any way?”

 

No.

 

“Did he ever say anything inappropriate?”

 

No.

 

“Did any of your friends ever complain he’d done anything inappropriate?”

 

“No,” with growing irritation this time, “ and this is totally ridiculous. I can’t think of anyone less likely to be inappropriate!”

 

“Okay, then. I had to ask.”

 

And I did have to ask, but I asked with full confidence in the answers. These boys have grown up in a parish where a priest has now been accused. The crisis that swirls in the Church has just ripped through our own sanctuary. My sons have been altar servers, in youth groups, in homeschool classes, and on trips with the accused priest.

 

They love him. He’s a character; a brilliant, quirky, long-winded character. He’s the guy who will interrupt a conversation when they are talking to girls just to ask if they’ve given any more thought to entering the seminary; the prettier the girl, the more likely he’ll interrupt. He’s the one who took them to

New York City

in the wake of 9/11 and takes big groups of young people to

Israel

every summer. He’s the one who is always willing to pull up a chair and listen to a confession, no matter where or when a teenager needs to talk. I could have asked those questions with my heart in my throat. But I asked knowing full well what the answer would be.

 

Then, I asked one more question, just to prove the answer to myself:

 

“Can you remember any time in the last seven years when you were ever even alone with Fr. B? Can you think of anytime, anywhere, where something like this even could have happened?”

 

Again, the answer was a definite no.

 

Mine is a parish that protects children. The lay community understands that in order for us all to live and pray together in an environment of mutual trust, we need to be totally transparent. Children are never alone with a single adult. Every adult who works with children is aware that not only do we avoid impropriety, we avoid the appearance and the opportunity of impropriety.

 

There is always grumbling about the requisite VIRTUS classes. There is always irritation that any activity with children requires more adults than really necessary. But there is always the security of knowing that our children are truly, truly safe. I can look back over the last seven years at this parish, and know that it couldn’t have happened to my boys. And for that I’m very grateful.

 

That security is important right now. Without a doubt in our minds about our own children, we can go forward and look to what will happen in our parish as the investigation goes forward.  We’ll remind our children that Fr. B. needs our prayers. The older boys are outraged that such a charge could be leveled against a beloved priest and we are so saddened to think of the pain involved for so many people. They want to help. They want to know how and why this could happen. With time, the truth will be known. For now, all they can do is pray.

What the boys are saying.

Pray for Fr. B.

Way more than two or more...

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We're gathering to pray for Heather, of the Homeschool Blog award staff, who will undergo brain surgery tomorrow. Please stop by and promise to pray and then hold her in your hearts and prayers!
Yesterday, Heather wrote:
But at this point I have no control over what Thursday holds for me. I can cry and flip out and waste these next 48 hours on what ifs and fear, or I can enjoy them knowing that whatever the outcome on Thursday- I lived my life to fullest. I laughed, I loved so very deeply, and more than anything I tried to share Christ's love at every opportunity these last 3 weeks. Come Thursday, all I can do is lay my antibacterial washed head down on that table and find peace in the knowledge whatever happens at the end of the day-

He’s already there.

Sounds like a good plan for all of us. Live life to the fullest; laugh; love deeply; and share Christ. Pray for Heather as you go about your joyful,busy day tomorrow.