Whew! That was fast. Just before I flipped the calendar page to May, I took one last look at April. This was a month in which Mom was in high demand. For every notation, a child had to be somewhere and they needed someone (me, usually) to get them there and they needed someone (me, usually) to be there with them. They also needed someone to wash the clothes they wore while they were there, to feed them before and after they went, and to care for their siblings at the same time. Oh, and they all had a full day of "schooling" (by me usually) before they left home. What isn't noted on the calendar are Mike's daily visits to the doctor for his back. And what is noted, but very understated, is that every "@" notation (there are 5 outside DC and two more in DC) represents an out-of-town business trip, a three day production trip. It's understated because he left the day before and returned the day after the @ notation. I've taken to noting only the day of production so that I don't hyperventilate when I see his absences all spelled out:-). When I look at the black and white facts--or the lavender and white, as the case may be--I understand better the priorities of my life. A little calendar study offers me much food for thought about the way I spend my days. More on that later, though.
This is all my ambling way of apologizing if you are one of the 792 people who have sent me an email which I have filed in my "to reply" file. I promise you I read it. I promise you I appreciated it. I can longer promise you I'll answer it. I'm a poor email manager. I read them and then I tell myself I'll write back just as soon as I get time to sit and think and compose. Sometimes, these are even emails from good friends. It's not like I have any sort of triage system. I read on the fly, get interrupted by someone, walk away from the computer. Nope, nothing scientific at all. Then, I get a few more emails, and the first one slips down the page, until it finally slips off the page. It makes me feel terribly guilty. It literally keeps me up at night sometimes. I thought about declaring email bankruptcy and just deleting them all. But I won't do that. Because they matter to me. And I will try to answer them. One day. I hope.
And no, I have no plans to buy any sort of handheld device that would allow me to answer emails from a soccer game. I don't multi-task. I don't even try. Life is too short not to be fully present in the given moment.
