My Room (Guest Post By Mary Beth)

During the bedroom switch, I moved up from the basement into my old/new room. This is the room that used to be mine and now is mine again. Since all of the little girls share a room now I have my own. Most kids talk about how they love having their own rooms but I have to adjust to not sleeping with either Katie and Karoline. It's a little bit weird to have my own bed and room. (Karoline now says she has two rooms: mine and hers and she still sleeps in mom's room at least half of most nights. Only Karoline could manage to come away from this project with 3 bedrooms). I do LOVE having my own quiet room though! We were not going to have to make any changes to the room except move my furniture up. Then we did the little girls room and their quilt didn't really match their room. Then the next morning,  Mom moved my quilt in and it did match perfectly, though at the time I wish it didn't because I love that quilt. So... Mom said that if I wanted to that I could keep my quilt and we could just get the little girls a new one that was like it, or we could swap, or they could keep mine and I could get a new one. I knew that my quilt matched perfectly and so we cleaned out my new room and made another trip to Target. Now, after getting the OK from Dad, we headed off to Target and left with:

A BEAUTIFUL comforter!

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Polka Dot Wall Stickers

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Polka Dot Curtains (They haven't really been hung yet. We need a bigger rod.)

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And a Pretty Striped Rug

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The rest of my room is:

A Dresser From Grandma and two white American Girl Doll shelves with free handed bows painted by mom.

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A bookcase that is just like the little girls except it's the older version which they don't sell anymore, so this just means that it is green instead of pink and it doesn't have a toy chest drawer.

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All and all, a GREAT ROOM! With a great theme: POLKA DOTS! We are still going to hang some pictures. The room didn't need to be painted either. It is blue. And the curtains make the light from outside shine this really pretty pink tone and my room looks pink-ish/purple-ish off of the walls:-)

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A Room Where Best Friends Begin Their Forever

As it began to dawn on us that both Katie and Karoline would lose their "best friends" (only friends?) to moves in the same week, Mike grew very protective. He wanted to do something for them. We both really just wanted to protect them from the hurt. Truth be told, the hurt wasn't limited to the little girls. For the last five years, Gracie has been in the space between Katie and Karoline. They don't have any memories of life in this house without her in it.And it's difficult for all of us to remember a time when she wasn't part of the family.

It is no secret to anyone who knows me that I deal with stress by cleaning and organizing my house. My friends remember how immaculate the house was the day the cancer diagnosis came. Mike, however, does not clean when he is stressed;-). His role was different. He instructed me to do whatever it took to create a new place for three little girls to grow up as best friends. He actually said, "I want them to have the perfect little girls' room and I want the room to make them happy." He's a very sweet guy and nothing brings out the sweet in him like his little girls. So, I abandoned my plan not to spend any money. He wanted to make a gift of this room and I was the instrument.

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The bed was given to us by my mother when we got married. It's queen-sized. Katie and Karoline can both sleep there.TheGood Shepherd picture above the headboard was a gift to me from Patrick's godmother. I love the idea of the Good shepherd watching my sleeping babies.

This dresser came from my father's attic.

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This one came from my mother's house. We need one for Sarah, but I'm going to scour Craigslist for awhile and see what pops up.

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The bookcase came from Costco a couple of years ago.

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My stepfather made the stuffed animal shelf for Michael's nursery 21 years ago. It has moved with us three times. And this bookcase was an old white pantry shelf in my in-law's basement before they moved. I painted it in a Home Depot Disney shade called "Invitation to a Princess." Appropriate, no?

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The room didn't really need painting but it did sort of look worn. We found stickers at Target and covered all the dings with flowers and butterflies. Tah-dah! Much quicker than a coat of paint.

These curtains were too cute for words, so we picked them up when we picked up the stickers.

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And then, I saw this rug. Hopscotch? Worth every penny just to watch Karoline try to do it. Worth even more to watch Daddy show Karoline how it's done.

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Around this time, I learned that Jessica and I were doing the same thing three thousand miles from one another. That made Mary Beth and I giggle as we continued to decorate.

Above the bed are pictures of the girls in the bluebells. They are just gorgeous in these frames. We're doing one above the chest for Karoline, so there will be three in all, but Target needs a little time to replenish the stock. Costco did a fabulous job with the enlargements, just like Lori said they would.

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The little girls helped with all the moving out and they were there as we moved furniture in, but we banished them to the basement while we stuck flowers on the walls and hung curtains at the window. When we invited them back to their new room, they reacted exactly as their Daddy had hoped.

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The quilt on the bed was actually Mary Beth's. I pulled it off her bed and was delighted by the way it looked in the room.

That left Mary Beth without a quilt and so begins the story for tomorrow..

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What Have We Done Here?

Schoolroom 

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We dismantled the "schoolroom." This was a long time coming. And I think it's a good thing. Last year, around this time, with bedrest looming, I began to think about that room and how tied we were to it. I was a little panicked by the prospect of "schooling" without it. And then, lo and behold, the "schoolroom" was moved bedside.

Bedrestnest 

bedrest nest

Except it wasn't. I was in bed and the children came into my room for instruction and conversation, but the schoolroom still existed. And the children went in there and pretty much had their way with the resources. The schoolroom was trashed. Even those things that were well-intentioned (can you say "endless Montessori printables?" Mary Beth's Montessori blogroll is three times what mine is), were taking up lots of room. During bedrest, I learned I didn't need that big, beautiful room to educate my children. What I really needed was just to give them my "uncluttered" attention. After the baby was born, I was utterly overwhelmed by the "stuff" in that schoolroom every time I wandered in there. And that wasn't all that often. I had broken my schoolroom habit.

The room is huge. And we had kids who didn't really have a bedroom. Three of them, to be exact. So, it hit me late one night, that the schoolroom had to go. The room I so lovingly created when we moved into this house nearly eight years ago, wasn't the best use of that space any more. Truth is, as nice as that room was, it encouraged some unhealthy things.

  • I was way too sedentary there. I would plop down in the desk chair and read, and point, and direct and pretty much never get up.
  • The computer was way too available there. Just a quick check while plopped in the aforementioned chair..sigh...
  • We had filled it with too much stuff. Too much stuff. Just because there's room for it, doesn't mean we should have it.
  • We were cramped in there and it was too busy. It had begun to feel a bit like a busy fishbowl.
  • I was burned out and I really felt like the schoolroom was feeding the fire. I wanted to begin again with a truly clean slate.

Aprons

the pantry before

So, we dismantled the schoolroom. We relocated many of the hands-on materials to a closet in the mudroom. Like the schoolroom, I had loved that closet when I first filled it. All neat and tidy, all full of food storage. Attachments, attachments, attachments. Now, I determined to fit a room full of stuff into the pantry closet, while relocating the pantry items to the kitchen. I would need to pare down the manipulatives and the pantry items and some kitchen items. This was to be detachment in a big way.

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the new mudroom closet

And I did it. And it's a good thing.

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Then, I moved the core materials of our learning--essential books, paper, crayons, and pencils, etc,--to our sunroom. There are three walls of windows there and then one half wall of wall space. I was not going to put anything in front of the windows. So, I forced a roomful of materials against one wall. The rest are to be given away. More detachment.

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Still a good thing.

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The computer was moved into the family room. The entire middle floor of the house began to open itself up to our active learning there. I can see how much more I'm going to move during the day now. The children have desks and some books in their bedrooms. The ones who are old enough be encouraged to spend time each day in quiet study at their desks. They'll curl up on the couch with me to read. We'll enjoy the fireplace much more this winter. And yes, I'll fold laundry throughout the day. I'll make sure that kitchen stays clean. I'll probably sweep the floor a lot more often. I don't think it will be a bad thing to integrate our learning and our household activities.

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And I'm so looking forward to having our mantel in front of us all day.

It's all looking like a very good thing.

Oh, and that left me with a very large, empty room where the schoolroom once lived. More on that room tomorrow:-).

Note on "Teaching" Faith to Teens

Questions about the new curriculum:

I  noticed that your selections for Religion are different from Jen's in your teenage girls' curriculum. Can you tell me why you are using what you are using? And why don't you call it Religion?

Mary Beth is my fourth teenager.When I first started putting together programs of study for the late middle school and high school years, I bought into  the popularly propagated notion that because teenagers are naturally argumentative, we should give them something to argue about and so "Apologetics" is perfect for teenagers. Now, I've reconsidered that a bit.

When I consider my goals, particularly for the early teen years, I most want them to know their faith and integrate it into their being. While I might like them to be able to answer the Mormon at the door or a skeptical evangelical from our neighborhood homeschool group or even the many Hindus who play in our backyard, that is not my primary goal. My primary goal is for them to hear and answer Jesus with joy.

My primary goal is that they know their faith to the very core of their being and that they develop a habit of relationship with Jesus while they are still in myhome. I truly believe that we are all called to make believers of all nations. The most effective evangelists though, are not the ones who have memorized the answers and mastered the art of debate. Instead, they are the kids who have their  sharing spill out of the joy in Jesus those good habits of relationship have helped to cultivate. When they are totally in love with Jesus and happily living in His Church, the apologetics angle falls into place in a very genuine way.

In my house, I've found it to backfire to equip a child with all these tools to "argue his faith." I have hyper-competitive children who might just easily lose sight of the fact that we're standing for truth and defending our Best Friend Forever, thinking instead that the point is just to be right and to win the fight. When the focus is on winning the argument, the discourse sounds dangerously like a fight and is likely to slip into something angry. Mixing the natural inclination to argue with materials that underscore an "us versus them" air of superiority seems to feed a contentious attitude.

The overt focus on arguing the faith can result in a curriculum that encourages too many words on the part of the teen. By shifting the focus to relationship with the Lord and His Church, I am hoping to cultivate good listeners--faithful adults who both listen to the Lord and to each other.

"Religion" is a subject and that is how this component of the course would be recorded on a transcript, but the real goal is a deep, maturing faith. I want to guard against strident, sanctimonious superiority that sometimes comes with a teenage focus on apologetics.   Faith is gift. If we think about that truth, it humbles us.  By keeping "faith"  along that margin, I am constantly reminded that it's not knowledge about the Church that I want to drill into them. It's love for Christ I want to imbue and, ultimately, it's the Holy Spirit who will "teach" this "course."

First off, my children  read these books by Amy Welborn. These are fairly quickly read, basic cornerstones:

Prove It: God

Prove It: Church

Prove It: Jesus

Prove It: Prayer

Then there is a decided emphasis on Peter Kreeft. Peter Kreeft resonates with the people in our home. What isn't listed on the young lady's curriculum are the Peter Kreeft books we read and discussed last year, books that were particularly suited to young teens seeking some answers for themselves. You could say they are apologetics books, but the emphasis is not on winning an argument with someone else. The emphasis is on truly understanding the philosophical underpinnings of the faith for oneself. A family I admire greatly, where all nine children embrace the faith as adults, have shared with me that their father sat with them as teenagers and talked about philosophy and theology on a regular and frequent basis. That kind of practice is not something I can replicate on my own in my home. I don't have the education that father has. But, I can read these books with my children and have those important conversations. Peter Kreeft helps me with the education part. I can't speak more highly of these books:

You will only see two core books listed for this year for my teenagers (Mary Beth's "religion" class and Patrick's are the same). This "living books" decision is a distillation of what has been the most meaningful with my teens in the last eight years of parenting teenagers.

The first book is Kreeft's Catholic Christianity. Many years ago, Catholic Christianity was recommended to me by Nicholas' godmother. Linda is a brilliant woman who has done a masterful job with the academic education of her children. She's also a former Evangelical Protestant, who was passionate about Jesus and winning souls well before she converted to Catholicism. This is the volume that spoke to her--that made sense both intellectually and spiritually. She used it with her young teens before they left homeschooling for Catholic high schools because it best embodied the gift she had discovered in the Church combined with the joy of the Christ of her youth.This book is a careful, well-crafted, articulate walk through the faith in a style reminiscent of C. S. Lewis. It's a step-by-step explanation of what we believe and why we can believe it. It represents the active part of the "religion course." We'll discuss each individual article until the three of us understand it for ourselves.The goal in our discussions won't be winning an argument; it will be helping each other to better understand the treasure of the faith.  I will purchase my fourth and fifth copies of this book this fall. Michael, Christian, and I already have our own personal copies. The next two are for Mary Beth and Patrick to keep.

The second book is the private, personal component of the "religion course." You Can Become a Saint is a book of habit training. If the wisdom in the book is applied and integrated into the lives of my children, they will have habits of a morning offering, meditation and spiritual reading,  time management that is ordered towards the will of God,  examination of conscience and night prayer. The book is drawn from Opus Dei spiritually. My family is not an Opus Dei family, but the habits here are time-tested habits of saints throughout time. They are not unique to any particular movement or spirituality. My dearest hope for this "course" is that they will cultivate the habits of a life in constant dialogue with Christ. Those habits will nurture a genuine joy in the Savior that will be organically effusive and will naturally draw people to them so that they might share their joy. In my opinion, those habits will engender genuinely kindhearted young people who are great apologists because they exude joyful charity.

Finally, each of my teens has a stack of biographies of heroes of the faith. Reading stories of the saints offers them a look at the many, many spiritualities that are represented in the body of Christ. As they learn more about themselves through spiritual reading and meditation, they will begin to identify more closely with certain saints over others. In doing so, they will make lifelong friends and companions for this journey  of faith. Stories of the saints are built into every single year of our educational adventure.

These are a lot of words to explain two simple book choices. If, together, we can truly integrate the wisdom of those two choices into our lives this year, our education will be a huge success.

Daybook: Making Home

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Outside My Window ...

it's so hot that the windows are steamy and I can't see outside.

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I am listening to...
little girls playing hopscotch in the room above me.
 

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To Live the Liturgy...
we will celebrate the feast of St. John Vianney by writing letters to priests who have touched our lives.

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To Fit and Happy...

I. must. start. walking. in. the. morning. Period.

Sigh. Last week's goal is still this week's goal.

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I am thankful for...
a house that is big enough to take on many forms throughout the lifetime of our family and children who can be motivated to help me make a vision become a reality. They can be. It just takes some doing sometimes;-).
~
 

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I am pondering this quote...

Whatever troubles may be before you, accept them bravely, remembering Whom you are trying to follow. Do not be afraid. Love one another, bear with one another, and let charity guide you all your life. God will reward you as only He can.
--Blessed Mary MacKillop

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From the kitchen ...

Friday we had mussels steamed in beer, caprese salad, and watermelon.

Summer on a plate

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I am wearing ...

My fat jeans. Really, I need to fit exercise in again.

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I am creating ...
brand new bedrooms and a new learning environment. 
 
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  On my iPod...
 
 
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Towards a real education ...

We've got some good things going for young ladies at Serendipity. Mary Beth begins today. Patrick is at camp this week and I'm knee deep in reorganizing my entire household. So, we're going for the staggered start strategy:-)

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I am thinking... 
that sometimes a change  is as good as a rest. At least that's what I'm hanging my hat on this August-- 'cause rest ain't happenin' here.
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In the Garden...
The basil and the roses are big and beautiful. The petunias are finally figuring it out. They're pretty, but it's a too little, too late kind of thing. This is what I'd hoped for; next year I"m going to consult Kimberlee before I plant a single thing.

 Around the House

We are moving rooms and shaking things up. So far, Paddy's room and the "new little girls's room" are completed. The sunroom has taken on our learning cabinets and baskets and the pantry now holds manipulatives. You can be assured of pictures throughout the week as we document our progress.

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Sarah Anne this week...

She said "DaDa!" And she meant it. We know this because she said it again and again and again, looking for Mike, and then affirming that she found him. I'm not jealous. Not one bit. She's my ninth baby. They all do this, except for Katie. She said, "ball" first. Can't blame her for that--she was schlepping all over the country watching ball games.

Poor Michael. Sarah Annie won't let him hold her. He's so sad and he clearly feels a bit like a stranger in his house after being away all summer. We're working on it

In other news, Sarah Annie sort of leans like she might think about crawling sometime. I've noticed that plenty of babies born after she was are already up and going. I'm reminding myself of last winter, when I watched those babies smile and worried so very much about my own little girl. Eventually, her eyes focused, she could see, and she rewarded our imperfect patience with the most delicious dimples in the world.

She'll crawl; she'll walk; she'll run.

And it will be beautiful.

Sarah will do, what Sarah will do when Sarah is ready to do it. She'll do it in her own time.

We're all singing the tune.

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I am reading  ...
not blogs. I'm not going to read blogs until I finish this house project and nail down the first draft of the book Danielle and I are writing. There's some motivation to stay focused:-)

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I am hoping and praying ...
for my precious aunt who has been diagnosed with cancer. We are watching and waiting through the very trying time of testing and decisions.
 
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On Keeping Home ...

I am investing in my home this week, truly digging in and creating spaces that reflect and support the family we are and the life we want to live here.

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One of my favorite things ...
summer from the top of a swing

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A Few Plans For The Rest Of The Week:
Paddy has soccer camp. Michael will be home all week for the first time this summer. We're going to keep on keeping on with the home reorganization.

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Picture thoughts 

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Love the Park! 
   

Be sure to visit Peggy for links to more daybooks.